How do I get to 280?

A man steps out of line and replies "I guess diet and exercise didn't work!"

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Man Jokes More Man Jokes

What do you call a man with potatoes in their ears?

Anything you want, He can't hear you!

What do you call a man with no arms or legs in your swimming pool?

Bob

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

Why did the college student ask for a refund on his student loan?

Because his *degree* didn't work!

What do you call a cancer doctor who works 24/7?

An on-call-ogist

Step Jokes More Step Jokes

What's the best vegetable for stepping on when you get out of the shower?

A toe-mat-o.

What did King Trident say when he stepped in the whale poop?

OH CARP!!!

Guess Jokes More Guess Jokes

How about an office party?

ME: crosses out "replace coworkers with puppies" I guess

What did one ocean say to the other ocean?

Nothing! They just WAVED. SEA what I did there? I'm SHORE you did. Let MINNOW if you are not getting it. SHELL I continue?? No?.. I guess I'll stop WHALE I'm ahead. Thanks ladies and gentlefish

Line Jokes More Line Jokes

Why are Paris's streets lined with trees?

German soldiers like to march in the shade.

Whose line is it anyway?

generous cocaine party guests

Exercise Jokes More Exercise Jokes

What exercise does Ned Flanders do at the gym?

Diddly squat

What kind of exercise did Jesus do?

Crossfit

Reply Jokes More Reply Jokes

What you got there?

Not sure", replies the fellow, "But you have got to try-a-lil'-bite!"

What do you feel when you shoot a terrorist?

The Marine shrugged and replied, "Recoil."

Diet Jokes More Diet Jokes

How is your diet going?

Horrible. I had eggs for breakfast." "Scrambled " "Cadbury."

Why did the elephants go on a diet?

A: Because they had too much junk in the trunk.