How do you tell 2 Scotsmen apart?

You lift their kilts, and whichever one of them has a Quarter Pounder is a McDonald!

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2 Jokes More 2 Jokes

How does Avis feel to be #2?

It Hertz

Why can't New Yorkers play chess?

They're short 2 towers.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How can you tell if a person is a vegetarian?

Don't worry. They'll tell you they're a vegetarian.

What can I get for you, Ma'am?

She says "Nothing, just wanted to tell you I'm vegan."

Mcdonald Jokes More Mcdonald Jokes

What do Intel, Google, Uber, eBay, McDonalds, Budweiser, AT&T, Oracle, Disney, Boeing, IBM and Apple have in common?

Immigrants

How many McDonalds workers does it take to change a lightbulb?

None, because they can't climb the ladder.

Quarter Pounder Jokes More Quarter Pounder Jokes

What do you call an anorexic blonde with a yeast infection?

Quarter pounder with cheese !

What do u call an anorexic women with a yeast infection?

Quarter pounder with cheese.

Kilt Jokes More Kilt Jokes

Why do Scots wear kilts?

Sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away.

How do you tell 2 Scotsmen apart?

You lift their kilts, and whichever one of them has a Quarter Pounder is a McDonald!

Lift Jokes More Lift Jokes

How did the Hulk feel after trying to lift Mjolnir?

He felt Thor.

What did the bra say to the top hat?

You go on ahead, I'll give these two a lift.