What did David say when the tourist tried to touch him?

Don't touch my marbles.

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Try Jokes More Try Jokes

What did Gandalf say when he tried to shut down Auschwitz?

You shall not gas!"

How about anonymous white people arguing with one another viciously on the internet?

Has that been tried yet

Tourist Jokes More Tourist Jokes

What do you call someone in the White House who is honest, ethical, intellectual, law abiding, and truthful?

A tourist.

What do West Virginians call a pretty woman?

A tourist.

Touch Jokes More Touch Jokes

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Disney Movies?

Disney movies can still touch children.

What do black guys have that's double the size of white men and gets bigger every time they touch a woman?

A. Their criminal record

Marble Jokes More Marble Jokes

What did David say when the tourist tried to touch him?

Don't touch my marbles.

Why was the slab of marble upset?

He was tired of everyone mistaking him for granite."

David Jokes More David Jokes

Why was Goliath so surprised when David hit him with a slingshot?

A. The thought had never entered his head before.

Who's on first?

David." "Cool." -Abbott and Costello's first draft