What do you do when your wife is blocking view of the TV?

Go to the kitchen and shorten her chain.

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What are these?

Me: The synonym rolls you asked for. Wife: CINNAMON.

What's the difference between wife and a blue whale?

About 10 pounds.

Tv Jokes More Tv Jokes

Why are DJ's called 'radio personalities' ?

Because if they had the looks they'd be on TV.

What should you do if you see your TV floating?

Turn on the lights and shoot the black guy.

Block Jokes More Block Jokes

What do you call a man holding two apples in one hand and three oranges in another?

No chance of blocking an uppercut.

What cheese is used to block online streaming?

Edam

Kitchen Jokes More Kitchen Jokes

What do you call it when a Catholic remodels his kitchen?

A counter reformation.

Who is second in command in the kitchen at a Native American owned restaurant?

The Sioux chef

Chain Jokes More Chain Jokes

Why did Mr. T reject Socialism?

Because he stumbled across a quote by Karl Marx which said: "All you have to lose is your chains."

What do you get when you mix two chains and a cow?

Truuuuuuuuuuu-moooooooooooooooooo!!!

View Jokes More View Jokes

How is a picket fence like a mini skirt?

They both protect the property but they don't spoil the view.

What's your view on lesbians?

1080p

Shorten Jokes More Shorten Jokes

How can you shorten a bed?

Don't sleep long in it.

What's the United States favorite brand of shortening?

San Fran Crisco