What's the difference between sandpaper and a baby?

The sandpaper doesn't scream when I rub it's face on wood.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a duck?

One leg is both the same.

What's the difference between a bull and a Samsung Note 7?

I'm not scared when the bull charges

Wood Jokes More Wood Jokes

How do historians know that Joseph wasn't Jesus' dad?

Because when you're a carpenter in the desert you can't get wood.

What's a foot long, is as hard as wood, and is slippery?

A wooden slipper

Rub Jokes More Rub Jokes

Why did Kermit the Frog split with Ms. Piggy?

Because she wouldn't rub it rub it. (blame Happy International Bacon Day)

What does a frog say when it washes car windows?

Rub it rub it rub it.

Face Jokes More Face Jokes

Who are you talking to in there?

M: *stumbles out of pantry with Nutella all over my face* nobody

What motivated Hercules to face off against Cerberus?

Alcmene triple-dog-dared him.

Scream Jokes More Scream Jokes

Why was the Doctor screaming angrily at his secretary?

He ran out of patients.

What is brown and screams?

Stevie Wonder when he answers the iron.

Baby Jokes More Baby Jokes

What's the difference between a baby and a submarine?

I've never been in a submarine.

Why do women love the smell of babies so much?

Because 50% of the taste is in the smell.

Sandpaper Jokes More Sandpaper Jokes

What does a blind person say when you give them sandpaper?

Well that's really tiny writing!"

What did the puppy say when it sat on sandpaper?

Ruff