What's white, digs holes in your garden and helps with headaches?

A paracetamole!

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Garden Jokes More Garden Jokes

Why did the idiot plant nickels in his garden?

He wanted to raise some hard cash.

What do you can an epileptic What do you call an epileptic in a garden?

Seizure salad. edit: fixed the word 'call'

Hole Jokes More Hole Jokes

Why shouldn't you carry two half dollars in your pocket?

Because two halves make a whole (hole) and you could lose your money.

How do you know when the hole you're digging is big enough?

When the (w)hole job's done.

Help Jokes More Help Jokes

What can you do to help ease a heavy traffic problem?

A: Carry loaded weapons.

What TV personality lives in your phone?

SIM Card-ashian! (it might help if you say it out loud)

Headache Jokes More Headache Jokes

What do trees take when they have a headache?

Aleve.

What did the ill kitty say to the playful puppy?

Not right meow, I have a headache."

Dig Jokes More Dig Jokes

How do you know when the hole you're digging is big enough?

When the (w)hole job's done.

Why is the archaeologist depressed?

Some old stuff just got dug up