Why did the mathematician quit his job and join NASCAR?

They told him he was good at deriving

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Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

Why do Japanese Sumo wrestlers shave their legs?

So you can tell them apart from feminists.

How do you confuse Hellen Keller?

Give her a basketball and tell her to read it.

Join Jokes More Join Jokes

Why did Bill and Ted join Islam?

Because they heard it was radical!

What happened to sneaking out and getting drunk in the woods?

Teenagers these days be all "I hate you mom I'm joining ISIS."

Job Jokes More Job Jokes

What do you get when you cross a Mexican and a black man?

Someone who steals your job then doesn't show up.

What's awkward for a man but a normal part of the job for a lumberjack?

Morning wood.

Quit Jokes More Quit Jokes

Why did the can crusher quit his job?

Because it was soda-pressing

Why did the cross eyed teacher quit her job?

Because she couldn't control her pupils.

Mathematician Jokes More Mathematician Jokes

Who was the first mathematician?

A concave man

What do you get a mathematician for his stag night?

A parallelogram.

Derive Jokes More Derive Jokes

Why wouldn't you hire bears from Australia?

Because they don't have the necessary koalafications. (Derived from: )

What did the calculus teacher tell the crew of his submarine while they were diving?

Derive, derive, derive!

Nascar Jokes More Nascar Jokes

Why is NASCAR so popular in the southern states?

Because that's where the most racists are.

How did NASCAR get that name?

Redneck: 'That's nascar ye got there."