Why divorce now after all this time together?

Woman: We wanted to wait until the kids were dead.

Previous Random Joke Next
Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What did my roommate say when I asked him if he wanted to watch the movie The usual Suspects?

Is it about black people

What did the one explorer say to the other when they arrived in Northern Canada?

Eh, you take this one. I don't want Nunavut. PS: I realize it's a double negative.

Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

Where did the kid with adhd go?

Aushwitz

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eyepatch?

Names!

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

What does a Chicago police officer and a professional skateboarder have in common?

They both shred footage. (*be gentle, it's my first time.*)

What is the most up-voted comment of all time?

repost"

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

How do you get a woman to stop texting you?

Reply to her message within a minute

How many women have you slept with My wife asked me, "How many women have you slept with?

I proudly replied, "Only you, Darling. With all the others I was awake."

Wait Jokes More Wait Jokes

How do you keep a idiot waiting?

I'll tell you guys later.

Why did the chicken cross the road to get to the other side?

ah wait, i can't remember the rest :/

Divorce Jokes More Divorce Jokes

What did Ray Charles say when his wife told him she wanted a divorce?

I did not see that coming.

Why did Santa want a divorce?

His wife made sure he only came once a year.