Chav Jokes

What do you call a chav in a suit?

The defendant."

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What do you say to a chav that has got a job?

Bigmac and fries please

Why does chav code never compile?

They end every statement with init

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End Jokes More End Jokes

What is old and ugly and can see just as well from both ends ?

A witch with a blindfold !

What is mitosis?

Those are the things on the ends of my feetsis. Thought of this during my last bio exam.

Statement Jokes More Statement Jokes

What happened when Santa cut his beard?

The police came and took statements but ultimately Mrs. Claus declined to press charges. OC

Why can't acids argue well?

All their statements are baseless.

Fry Jokes More Fry Jokes

Where was the first chicken fried?

In Greece.

What's it called when you fry up an egg with a bunch of different ingredients?

Omelette you figure it out

Defendant Jokes More Defendant Jokes

What did the defendant say when he saw his picture hung up in the courtroom?

I've been framed.

What can you say in your defense?

ampndash Defendant! Stop clowning and sit down!

Job Jokes More Job Jokes

What did the hippy say when he was told to get off the couch and get a job?

Namaste (pronounced:nah I'ma stay)

What does its job only after its been fired?

A bullet.

Suit Jokes More Suit Jokes

What do you call a scouser in a suit?

The defendant.

What's the difference between a well dressed man and a tired dog?

The man wears a full suit, the dog just pants