Existential Crisis Jokes

Why did the aquarium have an existential crisis when the dolphins were released to the wild?

It lost its porpoise.

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What do you call a mouse named Bob who's having an existential crisis?

Bob.

How do you give a solipsist an existential crisis?

You tell me.

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Dolphin Jokes More Dolphin Jokes

Why are dolphins all friends with each other?

They just click you know

What do you call a dolphin with agoraphobia?

endorphins

Bob Jokes More Bob Jokes

What do you call a quadruple amputee trying to swim?

Bob. Same guy laying on the floor Matt. Same guy hanging on the wall Art. Same guy in a mailbox Bill.

How do you call Bob the Builder when he is unemployed?

Bob

Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

What's the first thing a hillbilly says after losing her virginity?

Get off me Daddy, you're crushing my cigarettes.

What did people call Putin after he lost an arm?

Amputin

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How can you tell if someone is having a stroke?

There is lotion and used tissues laying around

Why did the midget get slapped?

Because he told a woman how nice her hair smelled.

Aquarium Jokes More Aquarium Jokes

What did the fish say to the man draining its aquarium?

WATER YOU DOING

Why did the aquarium have an existential crisis when the dolphins were released to the wild?

It lost its porpoise.

Solipsist Jokes More Solipsist Jokes

How do you give a solipsist an existential crisis?

You tell me.

Why shouldn't you tell a story to a solipsist?

Because they won't believe it.

Mouse Jokes More Mouse Jokes

What do you call a mouse with cheese but no crackers?

Cracka-lackin

What did the mouse say when his friend broke his front teeth?

Hard cheese.

Porpoise Jokes More Porpoise Jokes

What did the dolphin king say at the funeral of his faithful servant?

You have served your porpoise.

Why was the dolphin sad?

Because it had no porpoise in life.