Lindsay Lohan Jokes

How are Lindsay Lohan and the Note 7 alike?

The both leave your crotch on fire

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Why was Lindsay Lohan feeling sleepy?

He was buying drinks.

What did Santa Clause say when he came down Lindsay Lohan's chimney and found her spending Christmas Eve with her pals Miley Cyrus and Paris Hilton?

A: Ho, ho, ho!

What's the difference between Lindsay Lohan and the newspaper?

Lindsay Lohan never reads the newspaper in jail, but the newspaper always reads "Lindsay Lohan in jail"

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Note Jokes More Note Jokes

What type of writing makes the most money?

Ransom notes.

What has a ring but no fingers?

The former owner of a Note 7

Drink Jokes More Drink Jokes

Why did the blonde get fired from the sperm bank?

Because she was drinking on the job.

What does an alcoholic ghost drink?

BOO'S.

Crotch Jokes More Crotch Jokes

How do crabs get out of hospitals?

On crotches.

How do crabs leave the hospital?

On crotches...

Paris Hilton Jokes More Paris Hilton Jokes

What do you get when you cross Paris Hilton with Iggy Azalea?

A horribly depraved piece of human garbage.

What did Santa Clause say when he came down Lindsay Lohan's chimney and found her spending Christmas Eve with her pals Miley Cyrus and Paris Hilton?

A: Ho, ho, ho!

Miley Cyrus Jokes More Miley Cyrus Jokes

What do people call Miley Cyrus in Europe?

Kilometery Cyrus

Which is the favorite US State of Miley Cyrus ?

Montana.

Find Jokes More Find Jokes

Why couldn't they find the cheesemaker after the accident?

He was trapped under da-Brie!

What did the neckbeard wizard use to find his way around Hogwarts?

M'rauders Map

Spend Jokes More Spend Jokes

Why do stoners spend so much money?

because they're high rollers

What does a dyslexic, agnostic, insomniac spend most of his time doing?

Staying up all night wondering if there really is a dog.

Christmas Eve Jokes More Christmas Eve Jokes

What did Adam say to his wife on the day before Christmas?

It's Christmas, Eve!

What do the lady reindeer do on Christmas eve?

They hit the town and blow a few bucks.