Record Jokes

Why didnt Spock make a record of their voyage?

Because it was deep space . (the joke is how the outer space was very deep)

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What kind of animal can record video?

A cam-el. Get it, because a camera records things and a camel is a animal.

Where does Phil Collins record all of his music?

The stu-stu-studio.

What's the longest time in which you haven't consumed alcohol?

My record is 21 years.

What do you call a Korean with a dog?

vegetarian. For the record, I'm Korean and have a dog haha.

Who is the only man to record more knock outs than Mike Tyson?

Bill Cosby

How do birds record their songs ?

On duck tape !

What was the humor like back then?

I was just wondering about how many jokes today maybe irrelevant 100 years into the future. To test this theory, what are the oldest recorded jokes?

Why do Christian bands only record with Pro Tools?

Because they don't understand how to use Logic or Reason.

Who's Gotye?

while their kids were like, "What's a record

Who are you?

You're not even in this trial M: I know, I just want it on record

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What do you call a notebook where you record information about your poops?

Some people may call it a log journal, while others call it a diary-a.

What's all this?

Bracken: Well you told me to bring all my records with me and I did. Here's some by Willie Nelson Tammy Wynette and Garth Brooks . . .

What is the oldest joke we have on record?

X-post) http://www.reddit.com/r/AskHistorians/comments/2krnv8/whatistheoldestjokewehaveonrecord/

Why do brown women wear red dots on their heads?

Because they record everything. (I swear I made it up n I'm brown too)

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Vegetarian Jokes More Vegetarian Jokes

What did Darth Vader say to the vegetarian stormtrooper?

I find your lack of steak disturbing."

Who are the hamburgers favourite people?

Vegetarians!

Hear Jokes More Hear Jokes

Why do the Avengers keep calling Spiderman over to fix their computer?

Because they heard he's a web developer

What's a hipster's biggest problem?

You probably haven't heard it.

Animal Jokes More Animal Jokes

What type of animal browses Reddit?

Karma-vore

What animal has exactly 12 grams of carbon?

A mole

Camel Jokes More Camel Jokes

What do missiles, camels, and common fetishes have in common?

What " " -Toes." "Out. Just get out."

What do you get if you tie two camels together by the tails?

A palindromedary.

Bill Cosby Jokes More Bill Cosby Jokes

What do you call movie night at Bill Cosby's house?

Netflix and pill

What happens on the first date with Bill Cosby?

I don't remember

Korean Jokes More Korean Jokes

Why don't Korean captains wear hats?

Because they don't know what to do with cap sizes.

What's a Korean's favourite take on a traditional British meal?

German Shepherd pie.

Eliminate Jokes More Eliminate Jokes

What kind of footwear do Whitewalkers use?

The Hodor-eliminating kind.

What Olympic event that involves throwing should be eliminated?

Discuss

Collection Jokes More Collection Jokes

What did Darth Vader say to Admiral Motti after browsing his collection of George Michael records?

I find your lack of Faith disturbing."

How many rocks did Hank Schrader have in his collection by the end of Breaking Bad?

None, they were all minerals.