How can you tell if Asians have broken into your house?

The dog is gone, the homework is done, and they're still trying to get out of the driveway.

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Dog Jokes More Dog Jokes

What is the difference between a dog and a mailbox?

If you don't know you must lose a lot of mail.

What's gray and all around?

Everything. I'm a dog.

Break Jokes More Break Jokes

Why did the astronaut break up with his girlfriend?

Because he needed his space.

Why do windbreakers smell bad?

Because all they do is break wind.

Try Jokes More Try Jokes

What did the bartender say to the jumper cables?

You better not try to start anything.

Why do women have trouble peeing in the morning?

You ever tried to open a grilled cheese sandwich

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How do you know when a woman is about to say some thing intelligent?

She starts her sentance with "A man once told me"

How can you tell if a snake is a baby snake?

It has a rattle.

House Jokes More House Jokes

What's the difference between a good friend and a really good friend?

A good friend will help you move house A really good friend will help you move a body!

What's the best side of the house to build a deck on?

The outside

Driveway Jokes More Driveway Jokes

Where are the groceries?

ME: Bacon was on sale. WIFE: Oh god, what does that mean *sound of dump truck backing into driveway*

What's the difference between my daughter and my driveway?

I don't want to plow my driveway

Asians Jokes More Asians Jokes

Why do Asians squint with their eyes?

Because bombs are bright.

Why Asians are good at everything?

Because they're Asians, not Bsians

Homework Jokes More Homework Jokes

What didn't you do?

My homework"

How is it when my son has homework,I have to be involved?

Dude,I already did my time.