How can you tell when Halloween is coming too soon?

The sight of premature Ejack-o-lanterns in the neighborhood. I'm a Dad so this joke is OK

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Come Jokes More Come Jokes

Why are you studying your Easter candy?

I'm trying to decide which came first-the chocolate chicken or the chocolate egg!"

Why was the boy unhappy to win the prize for the best costume at the Halloween party?

Because he just came to pick up his little sister.

Dad Jokes More Dad Jokes

What's your excuse?

Well my dad says the world is changing every day . So I decided to wait until it settles down!"

What's in front of a woman and in the back of a cow?

The W. Yeah my dad just busted this joke on me.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What does a quantum physicist tell their toddler who keeps asking "Why" over and over?

Because I saw so."

How can you tell a dog is a cool dog?

It swags its tail.

Joke Jokes More Joke Jokes

Why don't jokes in base 8 work?

Because 7 10 11

What's the difference between hiring a team to write your jokes, and the team of joke writers itself?

One's a cunning plan, the others a punning clan.

Halloween Jokes More Halloween Jokes

What is an engineer's favorite Halloween candy?

Dork chocolate

What does a redneck do on Halloween?

Pumpkin

O Jokes More O Jokes

Why does Washington DC stink?

Because of the B O

What do you call 2 doctors walking together?

Pair-o-Medics

Neighborhood Jokes More Neighborhood Jokes

What does a black man and a tornado have in common?

It only takes one to ruin a neighborhood.

Why are school shooters more likely to be white people?

White people actually go to school. Black people stay home and shoot people in their own neighborhood.

Sight Jokes More Sight Jokes

Why did the girl walk past her crush twice?

He didn't believe in love at first sight.

What's the difference between Bigfoot and a Mexican with a beard?

Bigfoot is occasionally sighted