What do you love most in the world?

Me: You & your brother 4yo: Oh Me: What about you 4yo: The fire tree in Plants vs. Zombies Me: Oh

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World Jokes More World Jokes

How many Bernie supporters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One to hold the lightbulb, and the rest of the world to revolve around them

Who is the smelliest hairiest monarch in the world?

King Pong.

Brother Jokes More Brother Jokes

How do I tell them apart?

Her brother has a moustache.

Why so glum Chum?

asked the kindly stranger. "If my parents get divorced...will they still be brother and sister "

Zombie Jokes More Zombie Jokes

How do you turn a computer into a zombie?

Send it a byte. Kind of lame but I couldn't help myself.

What do you call a group of zombies watching The Sixth Sense while on a cruise?

High Seas Dead People

Love Jokes More Love Jokes

What did the green light say to the red light?

I love you, but I'm sick of yellow light always breaking us up.

What's black and white . . . What's black and white and loves kids?

Michael Jackson

Plant Jokes More Plant Jokes

What did one plant say to the other plant that was annoying him?

Please leaf me alone! Or I'll tell my mom, and you'll get in trouble.

What did Leonardo DiCaprio say when he planted a seed?

Inception

Oh Jokes More Oh Jokes

What's that machine for?

Oh, that's the forklift" ME: OH MY GOD HOW HEAVY ARE YOUR FORKS

What did the scientist say before he died by mixing Hydroxide and Nitrate?

OH NO !"

4yo Jokes More 4yo Jokes

What happened to the fish?

Me: It drowned. 4yo: ... Me: ... 4yo: ... Me: ... 4yo: Must have been a really stupid fish.

How'd you get amnesia?

4yo:.. Me:.. 4yo: I don't remember. Me: Well played..