Whats the difference between your mom and a washing machine?

When I drop a load in the washing machine it doesn't follow me around for a week.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a redwood and a dead baby?

A redwood won't fit in a wood chipper.

What is the difference between yoghurt and America?

When you leave yogurt alone it grows a culture!

S Jokes More S Jokes

Whats the difference between a Chickpea and a Lentil?

No one ever paid $50 to have a Lentil on their face.

Whats your GPA?

James answers: "4 2.4."

Mom Jokes More Mom Jokes

What did the mom say when she found out her son was going to be a evil spy?

Abort mission!

What do your mom and Poland have in common?

a lot of countries have been inside her.

Drop Jokes More Drop Jokes

Whats worse than having to break up with your Japanese girlfriend for the first time?

Her not hearing you, so you drop the bomb a 2nd time.

How do you advertise a French rifle?

Never fired, dropped once.

Follow Jokes More Follow Jokes

Whats the difference between a washing machine and a woman?

A washing machine doesn't follow you around after you dump a load in it.

What do you call those people who follow musicians around and try to hang with them after the show?

Drummers.

Week Jokes More Week Jokes

How do the Dallas Cowboys spend their first week at spring training?

A: Studying their Miranda Rights.

Why did Kim Jong-il die a week before December 25th?

Because Rudolph is the only deer leader at Christmas.

Load Jokes More Load Jokes

What's it called when the bottom half of a fraction has loads of cake in it?

A denom-nom-nominator!

Whats the difference between a girl and a washing machine?

When I dump a load in the washing machince, it doesnt follow me around

Washing Machine Jokes More Washing Machine Jokes

Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?

A: Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will never be able to support you.

What did the libertarian shirt say when it was thrown into the washing machine?

AM I BEING DE-STAINED?!