When do you know a lawyer is telling the truth?

When his lips are shut.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What did Norman Bates call his little sister?

You know you see it coming...) A: Psycho-sis! (I won't let the doorknob hit me on the way out..)

How did Jack know exactly where to find the goose in the giant's castle?

He had her.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

Why was Cinderella kicked out of Walt Disney World?

Because she sat on Pinocchio's face and told him to start telling lies.

How can you tell if you're on a Starcraft diet?

Not enough minerals.

Shut Jokes More Shut Jokes

How does a Muslim shut a door?

Islams it.

Why don't women fart?

They can't shut up long enough to build up pressure.

Lawyer Jokes More Lawyer Jokes

How can you tell a lawyer is lying?

Other lawyers look interested.

What happens to lawyers after they die?

They lie still.

Lip Jokes More Lip Jokes

When do you know a lawyer is telling the truth?

When his lips are shut.

What happened to the Irishman who tried to blow up a school bus?

He burned his lips on the exhaust pipe.

Truth Jokes More Truth Jokes

What else did Lochte say after the truth came out?

This did not go swimmingly at all

What did Cinderella say when she sat on Pinocchio's face?

Tell me a lie. Tell me the truth. Tell me a lie. Tell me the truth. Tell me a lie...