Why was the necrophiliac fired from the crematory?

He was caught spreading remains before they were cremated.

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Fire Jokes More Fire Jokes

How do you fire a Chinese cook?

Ask him to take wok.

Why don't hypochondriacs... Why don't hypochondriacs use lighters?

They're afraid of catching fire!

Catch Jokes More Catch Jokes

What do you call a women that catches fish?

Annette

Why was the penguin banned from the Winter Olympics?

He was caught taking Polaroids.

Spread Jokes More Spread Jokes

Why do moths fly with their legs spread?

Have you ever seen the size of mothballs?

Why are women like parachutes?

Because if they don't spread they are worthless.

Cremate Jokes More Cremate Jokes

Why did the blonde feminist want to be cremated when she died?

She thought a traditional burial would be too bio-degrading.

What did the cremated Buddha who was placed in a cardboard box say?

I'm in light urn.'

Remain Jokes More Remain Jokes

What do you think it'll be like?

The other student shrugs and says, "Remains to be seen".

How many polaks does it take to kidnap a child?

A: 12. One to kidnap the child and the remaining 11 to write a ransom letter.

Necrophiliac Jokes More Necrophiliac Jokes

What's the difference between a necrophiliac and someone with a granny fetish?

A couple of weeks

What does a Necrophiliac get at funerals?

Mourning Wood