Why was the necrophiliac fired from the crematory?

He was caught spreading remains before they were cremated.

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Fire Jokes More Fire Jokes

Why did Helen Keller fire her maid?

Cuz she left the plunger in the toilet. - Jackie Martling

What do you call a cop who doesn't shoot innocent black people?

1. Acquitted 2. Fired, retired or expired

Catch Jokes More Catch Jokes

Why should a man never bang his best friend?

He'll probably catch fleas

What was the name of the operation to catch Juaquin Guzman?

El trapo.

Spread Jokes More Spread Jokes

Why do all the ladies love Jesus?

spreads out arms to fullest length) Because he was hung like this.

What happened to the girl who put too many deviating data into her box plot?

In the end her spread was so large she had to present it without any whiskers.

Cremate Jokes More Cremate Jokes

What did the cremated Buddha who was placed in a cardboard box say?

I'm in light urn.'

What did the masterbating Australian mortician do?

Cremate

Remain Jokes More Remain Jokes

What do you call a body in a morgue which hasn't been viewed by anyone yet?

Remains to be seen.

What do you think it'll be like?

The other student shrugs and says, "Remains to be seen".

Necrophiliac Jokes More Necrophiliac Jokes

What's the difference between a necrophiliac and someone with a granny fetish?

A couple of weeks

What do Elsa and a necrophiliac have in common?

The cold never bothered them anyway......