Axe Jokes

What do people and trees have in common?

They both fall down when you hit them with an axe.

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How do you keep a clown from laughing?

Hit him in the face with an axe.

How do you get a clown off a swing?

hit him in the face with an Axe

How do you get a clown to stop smiling?

Hit him in the face with an axe

How do you stop a clown from laughing?

Hit it in the face with an axe.

What happens if an axe falls on your car?

You have an ax-i-dent (accident).

How to tell if you're wearing too much Axe: 1. Are you wearing Axe?

No- Good. Yes- That's too much.

How do you know Axe was invented by black people?

If it was white people who invented it, it would be called Ask.

What do you call a midget with an axe?

A battle dwarf

When O. J. Simpson's kids wanted to go out and play, what did he tell them?

Go axe your mother."

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Tree Jokes More Tree Jokes

How did the lumberjack keep his business from falling behind when all the trees ran out?

By moving faux wood. Rimshot

How do you get a one armed man out of a tree?

You wave.

Do Jokes More Do Jokes

How do '90s kids count to 6?

Uno, dos, tres, cuatro, cinco, cinco, seis.

Why cant a Mexican man sleep with three women at once?

Fear of over dos

White People Jokes More White People Jokes

Why do white people like cheese so much?

Because they're made from cultures! Edit: Five BLM members disliked this post.

Why do white people hate being called crackers?

Because they find it insaltine.

Track Jokes More Track Jokes

How do beer companies track their sales?

On dos axes

How about an app that keeps track of every working automatic paper towel dispenser in the world?

All seven or eight of them.

Midget Jokes More Midget Jokes

Where do midget terrorists live?

Halfghanistan.

What do you call a midget with epilepsy that makes pizza?

Little Seizures...

Bear Jokes More Bear Jokes

What did the polar bear's wife say when she couldn't bear his tantrums any more?

Bye bye bipolar polar bear

What do you call a bear who is athletically flexible?

Yogi

Ax Jokes More Ax Jokes

What did little Paul Bunyan say when his mom asked him how he damaged his favorite toy?

It was an ax-I-dent.

What happens if an axe falls on your car?

You have an ax-i-dent (accident).

Invent Jokes More Invent Jokes

Why wasn't the aeroplane invented in China?

Because two Wongs don't make a Wright.

Where is the lift?

American: You mean the elevator? English: Yes, we call it a lift. American: It's called an elevator. We invented it. English: And we invented the language.