Borg Jokes

What did Borg say to Georg Ohm?

Resistance is futile."

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What did the borg say to the medieval peasant?

Resistance if feudal

What did the Borg's existential brother say (Star Trek)?

Existence is futile.

How many Borg does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them.

What would you get if you cross breed a Borg with a Ferengi?

A scientologist.

Who's there ! Borg ! Borg who ?

Borg standard !

How many Borg does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them.

How many Borg does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Irrelevant, you will be assimilated!

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Screw Jokes More Screw Jokes

How many teens does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Just two, but you need a really big lightbulb.

How many Irishmen does it take to change a lightbulb?

One. He is drunk, and he tells the bulb to screw itself.

Star Trek Jokes More Star Trek Jokes

Why aren't there any mexicans in star trek?

They don't work in the future either.

How many Star Trek captains does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One, but there are FOUR LIGHTS!

Resistance Jokes More Resistance Jokes

Why does lightning only strike the French?

Because it follows the path of least resistance

Why did Blitzkrieg work so well in France?

Because lightning always follows the path of least resistance

Existence Jokes More Existence Jokes

How does a nihilist propose to his fiancee?

Even though my existence is meaningless I want to spend the rest of it with you."

What do you get when you cross a dyslexic, agnostic and an insomniac?

A person who stays up all night contemplating the existence of dog.

Scientologist Jokes More Scientologist Jokes

What did the Scientologist play on his Wii?

Xenublade

What's a Scientologist's favourite piece of furniture in Rivendell?

Elrond's cupboard.

Host Jokes More Host Jokes

What happens when you mock the host of Diners, Drive-In's, and Dives?

The guy gets fierious.

What happened when the host of Dirty Jobs said hello to a friend that was fairly far away?

Microwave.

Swedish Jokes More Swedish Jokes

What hood was the Swedish cholo from?

StockHOLMES!

What's the difference between a Swedish jam band and slam dunking a baby?

One's a Swedish Phish and the other's a fetus swish

Morgue Jokes More Morgue Jokes

Where's the best place to do a mannequin challenge?

In a morgue.

What do you get when you cross a Swedish tennis pro, a computer virus, and an insatiable hunger for mort flesh?

Cyborg Bjorn Borg hosting smorgasbords at the morgue.