Swedish Jokes

What's the difference between a Swedish jam band and slam dunking a baby?

One's a Swedish Phish and the other's a fetus swish

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Coffee Mug

What nationality is not quite one?

Swedish

What did the failed Swedish chef say?

All that hard Bork and nothing to show for it .

What did the Swedish chef say to his girlfriend when he found out she was pregnant?

Abort - Bort - Bort!

What hood was the Swedish cholo from?

StockHOLMES!

Where does a race on the Swedish border end at?

The Finnish line.

What do Swedish people put in their coffee?

Artifical Swedeners

How do you sink a Swedish submarine?

Knock on the hatch.

What do you call a scar left by the Swedish Chef?

A borkmark.

Why do Swedish men always have stupid grins on their faces?

Because they're stupid" said her friend.

How do you catch a Swedish fish?

With a gummy worm as bait

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Coffee Mug

Who's a good example of a Swedish Spaniard?

Per Ejemplo.

What do you get when you cross a Swedish tennis pro, a computer virus, and an insatiable hunger for mort flesh?

Cyborg Bjorn Borg hosting smorgasbords at the morgue.

What do Swedish criminals say when the cops are coming?

Pork! Pork! Pork!

You might also enjoy:

Hatch Jokes More Hatch Jokes

Knock knock. Who's there? Hatch. Hatch who?

Bless you!

How do you sink an Irish submarine?

A: Knock on the hatch.

Cross Jokes More Cross Jokes

What do you get when you cross a duck with an octopus?

Fired and blacklisted from the genetics industry.

What do you get if you cross a telephone with a night crawler?

Ringworm!

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

Why does Beyonce say "To the left, to the left"?

Because black people have no rights.

Why did the Carpenters wife leave him?

Because he was screwing around.

Dunk Jokes More Dunk Jokes

What does a guy from Philly dunk his pretzel in?

a girl from Jersey.

Why did the reporter only dunk chips in the middle of the dip?

He just wanted the inside scoop.

Computer Virus Jokes More Computer Virus Jokes

What is a computer virus?

A terminal illness.

What do you get when you cross a Swedish tennis pro, a computer virus, and an insatiable hunger for mort flesh?

Cyborg Bjorn Borg hosting smorgasbords at the morgue.

Host Jokes More Host Jokes

What do astronauts do to host a party?

They planet.

What is the most mysterious cheese?

I'm going to a cheese and wine party tonight and the host has requested I bring a "mystery cheese". I'm hoping there's a puntastic cheese out there somewhere that may fit the bill!

Friend Jokes More Friend Jokes

Where're you going?

Me: To dinner with my friends! Mom: Your friends Me: I'm going to use McDonalds' free Wifi to get on twitter...

Why did Ibuprofen miss his friends?

Because Paracetamol on fire.

Scar Jokes More Scar Jokes

What song did Scar sing when he fixed his car horn?

Beep repaired...

What do you call a scar left by the Swedish Chef?

A borkmark.