Injure Jokes

What do you call an injured martial artist?

Bruised Lee

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How do people with injured hands commute to work?

Carpool tunnels

What does an injured gyro say?

I falafel."

Who do you call when a sleepwalker injures himself?

The somnambulance.

What does a bird with an injured wing need?

Tweetment!

Where would you put an injured insect ?

In an antbulance !

What did the doctor say to the injured gingerbread man?

Why don't you try icing it

What is an injured persons favorite movie?

Cast Away

What do you call an injured Confederate soldier that can't find a medic?

A rebel without a gauze.

What if animals "were" injured in the making of a film. Do they list that in the credits?

Tim hurt one monkey. He is very sorry.

How did the newfie injure himself raking leaves?

He fell out of the tree

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Why did the 3d modeler need back surgery?

He injured his spline!

What do you call a goblin with an injured leg?

A hobblin' goblin

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How do you hydrate a 2 year old at Disney World?

Gatorade

What do you give an injured alligator?

Gatorade

Medic Jokes More Medic Jokes

What do you call the medic in a K9 unit?

A dogtor.

What do you call an injured Confederate soldier that can't find a medic?

A rebel without a gauze.

Tweetment Jokes More Tweetment Jokes

What do you give a sick bird?

A tweetment

What's the difference between swine flu and bird flu?

For swine flu you need "Oinkment", for bird flu you need "Tweetment".

Falafel Jokes More Falafel Jokes

What does an injured gyro say?

I falafel."

What did the sick gyro say to the other gyro?

I falafel.

Bruise Jokes More Bruise Jokes

Why does Mario hate Punchbug?

Because he bruises like-a Peach!

Why did the banana bruise?

Answer: Because it was given a good fruit punch! zing

3d Jokes More 3d Jokes

Why won't a black man go see a 3d movie?

He'd rather spend his money on a forty

Why did the 3d modeler need back surgery?

He injured his spline!

Newfie Jokes More Newfie Jokes

How did the Newfie get his wife pregnant?

and you call us stupid.

What is long and hard on a Newfie?

Grade 1.

Film Jokes More Film Jokes

What did the mathematician say about vertical videos?

I'm sorry, but the video you filmed is imaginary. Please rotate your phone 90 degrees and try again.

What do you do if King Kong sits in front of you at the cinema?

Miss most of the film!