Monastery Jokes

How many people does it take to change a lightbulb in a monastery?

Nun.

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What do you call the act of press-ganging someone into a monastery?

Force of habit.

How many pretty girls are there at a monastery?

Nun.

What did the Gregorian monk say when he was kicked out of the monastery?

Give me one more chants!

Why don't Buddhists vacuum in the corners of the monastery?

Because they have no attachments.

What do you you say when a monk tries to kick you out of the monastery ?

Namaste

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Buddhist Jokes More Buddhist Jokes

What does the sign at a nudist Buddhist beach say?

No Bhikkhunis(https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bhikkhuni) allowed.

What is an omelette?

A small Buddhist.

Open Jokes More Open Jokes

How does a blonde turn the lights on in the morning?

A: She opens the car door.

What did the mayonnaise say to the man opening the fridge door?

Don't look. I'm dressing."

Nun Jokes More Nun Jokes

Why do Nuns always wear the same thing?

It's a habit.

How many Women Priest are there?

Nun.

Fit Jokes More Fit Jokes

How do you fit 4 girls on a bar stool?

Flip it over

How do you fit 3 babies in a bowl?

Blender. How do you get them out? Chips.

Monk Key Jokes More Monk Key Jokes

What do they call a monastery key that opens all doors?

Monk key

How do you unlock a monastery door?

With a monk key.

Door Jokes More Door Jokes

What does a Mexican Morpheus say?

Neo, you are the Juan ... I'll show myself the door...

Why can nobody understand sausages when they talk???

Because they speak in tongs. I'll show myself the door

Try Jokes More Try Jokes

What was the first treacherous thing said?

Adam you gotta try this!

Whats the difference between a hippy chick and a washing machine?

When you drop a load in, it doesn't follow you around for 6 months trying to get spun. 8)

Monk Jokes More Monk Jokes

Why couldn't the monk who flew a helicopter understand the monk who flew commercial jets?

Because he was on a higher plane.

When is it okay for monks to use e-mail?

When there are no attachments