Nice Jokes

What do you call someone pretending to nice to people just to get upvotes?

karma chameleon

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What's the difference between a lorry with good brakes, and a lorry with nice brakes?

A Lorry with Nice breaks doesn't stop until after a mile.

Why are terrorists so mean?

Because they don't like Nice people.

Why are socially-aware western tourists avoiding Nice, France for their late-summer getaways?

All that Muslim hatred can really run you down.

What has four legs but isn't alive?

The son says,"Nice try dad, a chair!" "Not this time son, our dog is dead"

What is OHM's Law?

Ans. It is very good law, It is very useful law, Nice law, Its a Scientific Law, I have studied this law.

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Nice Belt Jokes More Nice Belt Jokes

What did the 0 say to the 8?

Nice belt.

What did the 0 say to the 8?

Nice belt."

Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

What is the best way of stopping infection from witch bites ?

Don't bite any witches !

What's the difference between the 9/11 attack and a dairy cow?

You stop milking the cow after ten years.

Arm Jokes More Arm Jokes

What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs?

Names

How much does it cost to buy multiple prosthetic limbs?

An arm and a leg.

Pretend Jokes More Pretend Jokes

Why do Hutterites children pretend to be pirates?

Because they ARRRRRRR retarded

Why's the necrophiliac's blow up doll half inflated?

So he can pretend she's decomposing.

Nice Car Jokes More Nice Car Jokes

Why are there no nice cars in heaven?

Because abortions float.

How about sonic?

She said, "That's not somewhere nice" I said, "It is if you go in a nice car."

Finish Jokes More Finish Jokes

Why don't emus ever finish all the food on their plates?

They don't want to be ostrich-sized!

What is the difference between complete and finished?

If you find the right woman, you're complete.

Karma Chameleon Jokes More Karma Chameleon Jokes

How was the Redditor with only one karma upvote able to look like he had five karma upvotes?

He was a karma-karma-karma-karma, karma chameleon!

What do you call a Hindu lizard?

A karma chameleon

Gnome Jokes More Gnome Jokes

What do you get when you cross Gnomes and Worgen??

Micro-Worgenisms! (From my Bizzard support ticket response today.)

What's the difference between a gnome and an elf?

Gnomenclature.