How do you put a condom on a elephant?

You take the c out of ice and the f out of weigh.

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Elephant Jokes More Elephant Jokes

How can you tell when there's an elephant in your sandwich?

When it's too heavy to lift.

Why doesnt Kermit like elephants?

They always want to play leap-frog with him.

Condom Jokes More Condom Jokes

Why is it prestigious to wear a condom?

It's a members-only jacket.

What do you call a balloon animal made out of a condom?

A Trojan horse.

F Jokes More F Jokes

What's the difference between a politician and a flying pig?

The letter F.

How do you fit an elephant in a thimble?

You take the "I" out of "thimble" and the "F" out of "way."

C Jokes More C Jokes

Why can't pirates finish the alphabet?

because they get lost at C!

How did Canada get its name?

They picked random letters out of a hat. C.... eh? N... eh? D....eh?

Ice Jokes More Ice Jokes

What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long?

Polaroids

What can I get you today?

Harambe: May I get a martini Me: Just ice for Harambe. Harambe: Just ice Me: Justice for Harambe.

Weigh Jokes More Weigh Jokes

Where do you weigh pies?

Somewhere over a rainbow...

What part of a fish weighs the most ?

It's scales !