What do bears and women from Arkansas have in common?

They can't stop licking their paws.

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Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

Where do ghost trains stop?

At devil crossings.

How do you stop a nuclear bomb from squeaking...?

WMD40.

Bear Jokes More Bear Jokes

Why didn't the grizzly wear any shoes?

He wanted to go bear foot.

How do you know which bear to talk to in a bar?

You have to read ursine.

Lick Jokes More Lick Jokes

What's the difference between a woman and a plate?

You can't lick a woman dry. Rimshot*

What do you do after you licked the softest and sweetest puss in the world?

You put it back in the crib.

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

What do black guys have that's double the size of white men and gets bigger every time they touch a woman?

A. Their criminal record

How many women does it take. . . to screw in a lightbulb in a convent?

Nun.

Arkansa Jokes More Arkansa Jokes

How do you tell if an Arkansas girl is old enough to marry?

A: Make her stand in a barrel. If her chin is over the top she's old enough. If it isn't cut the barrel down a bit.

What do you get from 3 girls from Arkansas?

Damn near a whole set of teeth.

Paw Jokes More Paw Jokes

Why does he do that?

Me: He's on paws. X: ... Me: On... paws. X: I hate you so much.

What did the cat do when he didn't want to watch the movie?

He paws-ed it!