Why do you want to participate in this guerrilla war?

Me: picturing myself leading an army of gorillas into battle "Independence."

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Whats the difference between a kink and a fetish?

A kink is something put in a hose, a fetish is something she wants to put in your hose.

What's the only major difference between Cinco de Mayo and Saint Patrick's day?

Nobody wants to pretend to be a Mexican for a day.

Picture Jokes More Picture Jokes

Why do you want to participate in this guerrilla war?

Me: picturing myself leading an army of gorillas into battle "Independence."

Why do you look surprised in all your selfies?

Didn't you know you were taking the picture

Gorilla Jokes More Gorilla Jokes

Which technique does a Gorilla borrow from another animal when it gets romantic?

The bear hug!

Which drink makes a Gorilla feel tipsy?

An ape-ricot sour!

Army Jokes More Army Jokes

Why did Shakespeare refuse to join the army?

He didn't like the phrase fire at will!

What do you call an army of toddlers?

Infantry.

Lead Jokes More Lead Jokes

How do you lead a horse to water?

With carrots

Why are there no owls here?

I WAS LEAD TO BELIEVE THERE WOULD BE OWLS HERE! #hooters

Participate Jokes More Participate Jokes

What's the difference between fighting on the internet and participating in the paralympics?

None, even if you win, you're still retarded.

Where did you get that gold watch Joe?

Joe: I won it in a race. Bill: How many people participated in it Joe: Three a policeman the owner of the watch and me!!