45 Jokes

What do you get when 42 goes into 45?

Chelsea.

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What's the difference between the charismatics and the nacists?

What is 32% black, 45% white... ...gets lit up and changes to blue and red at night?

Chicago.

Why are your eyes dilated?

Me: "Your eyes dilate up to 45% when you look at something you love" Mom: "What were you looking at " Me: "Memes"

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Night Jokes More Night Jokes

What do you call it when a person acts holy for a night then sins every day after?

A one night stand with Jesus

What does a dyslexic,agnostic and insomniac spend most of his time doing?

Staying up all night thinking if there really is a dog

Hair Jokes More Hair Jokes

What do you call the hair of a centaur?

Humane.

When do you kick a midget in the nuts?

When he stands next to your girlfriend and says her hair smells nice.

Nickelback Jokes More Nickelback Jokes

Who is Nickelback's biggest fan?

Helen Keller.

What do you call a rock group of 4 men who don't sing or play music?

Mount Rushmore. Or Nickelback. I'm so sorry.

45 Cent Jokes More 45 Cent Jokes

What concert is worth 45 cents?

50 cent with Nickelback

What concert costs 45 cents?

A concert that costs 45 cents.

Junk Jokes More Junk Jokes

What's the difference between art and junk?

A plaque.

What did the Chinese fisherman say to his at-risk son?

Stay on the junk, and you'll go far.

Cost Jokes More Cost Jokes

Why do LEGO men hate going to hospital...?

Because plastic surgery costs a fortune!

What did Obi-wan say to Skywalker the first time he saw him as Darth Vader?

snickering) Nice suit, must have cost you an ...

45 Pound Jokes More 45 Pound Jokes

What's the difference between Jared from Subway's gut and his junk?

He prefers his gut when it's down 45 pounds, and his junk when it's up 45 pounds.

What is the difference between a wife and a girlfriend?

About 45 pounds. What's the differece between a husband and a boyfriend 45 minutes

45 Year Old Jokes More 45 Year Old Jokes

What do a 45 year old pregnant alcoholic and Ironman have in common?

Both have a little Downy Jr in them.

Why was the 45 year old businessman losing his hair?

He has cancer.