Baseball Game Jokes

Where is the first baseball game in the Bible?

In the big inning. Eve stole first, Adam stole second. Cain struck out Abel. The Giants and the Angels were rained out.

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What did Glenn say to Maggie at the baseball game?

I'll keep an eye out for you!

What about the two old ladies who brought a bottle of whiskey to the baseball game?

At the bottom of the fifth the bags were loaded.

What did the mathematician do at the baseball game?

4 the home team

How do fast food restaurants make so much money?

OC "They flip burgers for profit!" Just thought of this at a baseball game today, kinda quirky and simple!

What has eight legs and an IQ of forty?

Four guys watching a baseball game.

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It's a bunch of guy's without pants fighting for a belt....

Why do hitman always wear gloves?

because theyre always wacking guys off....

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Why did the kittens turn atheist?

Coz their eyes opened.

Why do you hold your hand flat above your eyes when you look into the distance?

Because when you would cover your eyes with your hand, you wouldn't see sh*t. I'm lame.

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What was the first reference to pole vaulting in the Bible?

When Jesus cleared the temple.

What do you call a Bible for the blind?

The Holy Braille!

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Why was the Muslim arrested for speeding during Ramadan?

Because he was going *to fast*!

Why does Ramadan go by so quickly?

Because we fast.

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How can I help you today, Mr Simpson?

BART: I don't know where my hair starts

How is today Monday?

It was Friday only a few hours ago...

Strike Jokes More Strike Jokes

What happened to the baseball played who was unfaithful to his wife?

He was thrown out at home. - His two balls got a strike.

Why did the bees go on strike ?

Because they wanted more honey and shorter working flowers !

Glenn Jokes More Glenn Jokes

What is Glenn's (The Walking Dead) favorite restaurant?

SPOILERS*** Popeyes!

Whats's Glenn's favourite restaurant?

Popeyes

Fifth Jokes More Fifth Jokes

How many black Oscar nominees would it take (compared to white nominees) to satisfy the boycotters?

Three-fifths as many seems like a generous offer.

What do you usually find with four Catholics?

A fifth.