Graduate Jokes

What do you call a Med School student who graduates with all C's?

A Doctor.

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Why were the Beakers all packed and moved out of the university lab?

They were graduated

What do you call the worst Dr. who graduated from the worst med school?

Dr.

What do math majors get when they graduate?

A radian. Math majors don't use degrees.

What do you call a muslim who graduated?

Allah-mni!

How do you know if somebody graduated from Harvard?

They'll tell you.

What does the Philosophy major say a year after he graduates?

Would you like fries with that "

What do you call a blonde in the freezer?

Her parents named her Cindy so we should probably continue to call her that. She was supposed to graduate tomorrow.

Where did you receive your education?

Me: Yale Interviewer: Wow! When did you graduate Me: I yust got out in Yuly

What do you call someone who barely graduated from med school?

Doctor.

What do you call a Native American who graduated from medical school?

A doctor you racist

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What did Ferris Bueller do after he graduated high school?

He went to Europe to study a-Broderick

What do you say to a vampire when he graduates from college?

Coagulations!

What do you call graduates from secret society school?

Alumniati

Who is a Graduate student's least favorite Greek Hero?

Thesus

What do you call a Native American who graduated from med school?

A doctor, you racist!

What do you want to be when you graduate high school?

No more than 25" from Gary Muledeer

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Family Jokes More Family Jokes

What is the difference between a black man and a couch?

A couch can support a family

Why did the watermelon and the honeydew decide to cancel their spontaneous wedding in Las Vegas?

They realized with a family like theirs, they really Cantaloupe.

Light Bulb Jokes More Light Bulb Jokes

How many line dance instructors does it take to change a light bulb?

A. Five!...Six!...Seven!...Eight!

How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

A: Seven one to change and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.

Job Jokes More Job Jokes

Why did the cyclops quit his job as a teacher?

He only had one pupil.

What's the difference between a hipster and a lumberjack?

The lumberjack has a job.

Harvard Graduate Jokes More Harvard Graduate Jokes

How do you know that someone you met is a Harvard graduate?

He already told you so.

How do you get a Harvard Graduate off your porch?

You pay him for the pizza.

Pay Jokes More Pay Jokes

Why do women live longer than men?

Shopping never causes heart attacks, but paying the bill does!

How much do pirates pay to get an earring?

A Buccaneer.

Radian Jokes More Radian Jokes

Why don't mathematicians have degrees?

They prefer radians.

What do math majors get when they graduate?

A radian. Math majors don't use degrees.

Harvard Jokes More Harvard Jokes

How many Harvard graduates does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one. He holds up the light bulb, and the world revolves around him

How do you know that someone you met is a Harvard graduate?

He already told you so.

College Jokes More College Jokes

Where do galaxies go to college?

University! Happy 1st day back to school to many of you :)

What did the buffalo say to his son who was going off to college?

Bison!