Laugh Matter Jokes

Why was the 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 was a registered six offender... that's not a laughing matter...

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Why are atoms so serious?

Because they're no laughing matter.

Why can't Californians stop at stop signs?

I don't know and this is not a laughing matter.

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Pull Jokes More Pull Jokes

Why is it so hard to pull over on the Pirate Highway?

Because there's a parrot on the shoulder.

When a cop pulls you over and asks, "Papers?

answer "Scissors." then drive away..

Ai Jokes More Ai Jokes

What do you call it when a hedge fund manager loses his job to a Watson inspired AI built by IBM?

It doesn't matter. We'll all be laughing too hard to care.

What is an AI's favorite food?

RAM crackers

Watson Jokes More Watson Jokes

What the hell is that?

Sherlock responds, "A lemon tree my dear Watson."

What type of rock is this Holmes?

It's sedimentary my dear Watson!

Dr. Jokes More Dr. Jokes

How much has this man had to drink?

Nurse: "I can't tell." Dr: "It's ok; you can tell me. I'm a doctor"

What do you call the worst Dr. who graduated from the worst med school?

Dr.

Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

How did the Italians lose WWII?

They ordered ziti instead of shells.

What is Apple's CEO's favourite TV show?

Lost

Stick Jokes More Stick Jokes

What can a lawyer do that a duck can't?

Stick his bill up his arse.

Which actress would you like to get stuck in an elevator with?

Me: One who knows how to fix elevators.

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What is a prime way of knowing when a retard is thirsty?

He'll have water on the brain.

What does idk stand for?

Literally everyone I ask doesn't know.

Inspire Jokes More Inspire Jokes

What medication that can make people inspire you?

Aspirin sorry guys

What do a Marionette User and Tampon Thief have in common?

They both pull strings for work. (Inspired by Bo Burnham, this popped into my head the other day)