Lead Singer Jokes

What did the lead singer of The Prodigy say to the guy parking his Mini Cooper?

Back my Smitch Up!

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Why did the lawyer refuse to take payment when defending the lead singer of U2?

Because he said he was pro Bono.

Why does the lead singer of Sublime hate tennis?

Cause love is what I got

What do you call it when the lead singer of U2 fights with himself?

Bono-y-Bono

Why did the lead singer of Drowning Pool lose his job at Starbucks?

HE LET BISCOTTI HIT THE FLOOR

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Starbuck Jokes More Starbuck Jokes

What did the hipster say when a starbucks opened in his neighborhood?

You can't gentrify this place! I just moved here!"

What is a Muslim who works at Starbucks called?

A Terrista

Lawyer Jokes More Lawyer Jokes

Who said that just because I tried to kiss you at last month's Christmas party, you could neglect to do your work around here?

Secretary: My lawyer.

Why do fifty percent of marriages end in divorce?

Well, I'm guessing it's because the other fifty percent can't afford lawyers.

Guy Jokes More Guy Jokes

How many guys in IT does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two. One to identify that the lightbulb has indeed burned out, and one to call the maintenence man to change the lightbulb.

What's the difference between a guy falling from the 20th or the 1st floor of a building?

20th floor fall goes: *Aaaaaah, BAM!* 1st floor fall goes: *BAM, Aaaaah!*

Job Jokes More Job Jokes

How to get a job on Game of Thrones: Q: Can you act?

A: Sorta Q: Will you get naked A: Yes HIRED!

Why did the programmer quit his job?

Because he didn't get arrays.

Cause Jokes More Cause Jokes

Why can't Michael Jackson drive backwards in a car?

Cause he's dead.

Why are black people so good at basketball?

Cause all they know to do is steal, run, and shoot

Refuse Jokes More Refuse Jokes

Why did the clown refuse to juggle?

He didn't have the balls to do it.

Why did the feminist get fired from Subway?

Because she refused to make a sandwich

Park Jokes More Park Jokes

Where do pigs park their cars?

In porking lots.

What do you call a 5'10" fortune teller parked in the middle of a divided highway?

A medium medium on the median.

Team Jokes More Team Jokes

Why doesn't Mexico send a team to the Summer Olympics?

Because all the one that can run, jump, or swim are already in the US.

What did the prarie dog coach say to his team?

Just gopher it.