U2 Jokes

Which lawyers are U2 fans?

The pro bono ones

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Why did the lawyer refuse to take payment when defending the lead singer of U2?

Because he said he was pro Bono.

What is the most said band name during the holidays?

Why don't U2's lawyers ever make any money?

All their work is pro Bono.

What do you call it when the lead singer of U2 fights with himself?

Bono-y-Bono

Who would win a football game between the 1989 Raiders and a team full of U2 lead singers?

Bonos.

Why did Microsoft name their new web browser "Edge"?

Because people familiar with the U2 guitarist of the same name are already used to long delays.

How many members of U2 does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Three to screw it in and Bono to explain it to the world.

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Lightbulb Jokes More Lightbulb Jokes

Whats the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb?

You can unscrew a lightbulb.

How many Mormons does it take to change a lightbulb?

Ten. One to actually change the lightbulb and nine to bring refreshments

Lawyer Jokes More Lawyer Jokes

What does a lawyer say to another lawyer?

We are both a lawyer.

What did the lawyers say when they finished their basketball game?

Court is adjourned

Member Jokes More Member Jokes

What do you call a gorilla that's a member of a terrorist organization?

Boko Harambe

What's the difference between an flautist and a Porsche?

Most members of the band haven't been in a Porsche.

Payment Jokes More Payment Jokes

What's this payment?

Me: we're sponsoring a panda! W: so is this monthly M: No, it's just for the one skydive

When did razors get so expensive?

Three more payments and I'll be able to shave

Screw Jokes More Screw Jokes

How many divorced men does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Who knows, they never get the house.

How many South American people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A Brazilian

Holiday Jokes More Holiday Jokes

What do heavily-armored army vehicles celebrate for the holidays?

tanksgiving

Why did the man with acute bronchitis go on holiday?

Because he had a wee cough

Defend Jokes More Defend Jokes

How many Frenchmen does it take to defend Paris?

Nobody knows because they've never tried

Why are marines who can't swim better?

They defend the ship with way more enthusiasm.

Team Jokes More Team Jokes

Who would win a football game between the 1989 Raiders and a team full of U2 lead singers?

Bonos.

Why I gotta do it too?

Her: No I in team Me: Isn't 1 in diet either. Her: Yes there.. Me: I'm too hungry for your mindgames!