Paralyze Jokes

What has arms but can't move them?

A small child paralyzed from the waist up.

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What do you call a woman who is paralyzed from the waist down?

Wife.

What does a horse and kryptonite have in common?

They both paralyze superman

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Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

Why do you need to be 35 to be elected president?

So women don't get elected.

Why is it easier for women to shave "downstairs" than men?

They don't have to go through as many obsticles.

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What does the snowman call his wife?

Snowblower

What is the punishment for bigamy?

Two wives.

Kryptonite Jokes More Kryptonite Jokes

What Did Superman Tell Superwoman?

Do you want to be in my Crib Tonight (Kryptonite)

What does a horse and kryptonite have in common?

They both paralyze superman

Horse Jokes More Horse Jokes

How do you get a horse out of jail?

Hay bail.

What animal always goes to bed with its shoes on ?

A horse !

Crip Jokes More Crip Jokes

Why did the crip cross the road?

Chuz

What do you a paralyzed gangster?

A crip.

Martial Art Jokes More Martial Art Jokes

What do you call martial arts for cows?

Mooey Thai.

What martial art do cows practice?

Moo-thai.

Toe Jokes More Toe Jokes

What's the difference between a camera and a foot?

A camera has photos and a foot has five toes. (Told to me by a 9 year old child I work with)

What do you call man without toes?

What do you call a man without toes and is allergic to milk Lack-toes intolerant!!

Tongue Jokes More Tongue Jokes

What's worse than a whale with a sore tooth?

When you go to kiss your grandma goodbye and she slips you the tongue.

What has a tongue, cannot walk, but gets around a lot?

Steven Hawking