Rolling Stone Jokes

What's a racists favorite song by the Rolling Stones?

Paint it, black!

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Why didn't Mick Jagger pick Randy Moss up from the airport?

Because a Rolling Stone gathers no Moss.

Which band does rockclimbers listen to ?

Rolling Stones

What's the difference between the Rolling Stones and Scotsman?

The Rolling Stones say "Hey, you, get off of my cloud." A Scotsman says "Hey, McCloud, get off of my ewe."

What's the difference between the Rolling Stones and a Scottish shepard?

The Stones say "hey you get off of my cloud!" The Shepard says "hey Mc Cloud get of of my ewe!"

What is a rock's favorite band?

The Rolling Stones.

What's the difference between the Rolling Stones and a Scottsman?

The Rolling Stones say "Hey! You! Get off of my cloud!" And a Scottsman says "Hey McLeod, get of me ewe!"

How do the Rolling Stones like their burgers?

Plain - Rolling Stones gather no moss-tard!

What's the difference between the Rolling Stones and a Scottish sheep farmer?

One says, 'Hey! You! Get off of my cloud!' The other says 'Hey! MacLeod! Get off of my ewe.'

What's the difference between The Rolling Stones and a Scot?

One says "hey, you, get off of my cloud", and the other says "hey, McLeod, get off of my ewe".

What's the difference between a Scotsman and the Rolling Stones?

The Rolling Stones say 'hey you, get off my cloud.' the Scotsman says 'hey MaCleod, get off my ewe.'

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What's the difference between the Rolling Stones and a Scotsman?

The Rolling Stones sing "Hey You! Get off of my cloud!" A Scotsman shouts "Hey Mcleod!! Get off of my ewe!"

What are the Rolling Stones better at than the Bee gees?

Stayin' Alive

What's the difference between a Scotsman and a Rolling Stone?

A: A Rolling Stone says "hey you get off of my cloud!" while a Scotsman says "Hey McLeod get off of my ewe!"

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English Jokes More English Jokes

Which word is the longest in the English language?

Smiles - because there is a mile between the first and last letters

What's the difference between the English rugby team and a teabag?

A teabag stays in the cup longer! (im so sorry -)

Sing Jokes More Sing Jokes

What genre can't Ed Sheeran sing ?

Soul

What did Jeffrey Dahmer sing as he went to the refrigerator?

My Bologna had a first name.

Stone Jokes More Stone Jokes

What do Israeli soldiers do when they get bored?

A: They go over to the West Bank & the Gaza Strip and get stoned.

What would happen if The Styx and The Stones got a band together?

It wood rock.

Rock Jokes More Rock Jokes

What's a priest's favorite type of rock?

Pummus.

Why would you throw a rock at a Mexican man riding a bike?

Because it's probably your bike. Why would you throw a rock at a black man riding a bike? Because it's probably your black man.

Listen Jokes More Listen Jokes

What do you call the James Brown songs no one listens to?

Defunct funk.

Who do fish listen to when they want to hear some dubstep?

Krillex.

Scottish Jokes More Scottish Jokes

Why do the Scottish wear kilts?

Sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away

What does a Scottish cat say?

Mee yew!

Scotsman Jokes More Scotsman Jokes

What does robbing a Scotsman get you?

Kilt

What's the difference between Mic Jagger and a Scotsman?

Mic Jagger says "Hey you, get off of my cloud". A Scotsman says "Hey, McLeod! Get off of my ewe!"

Hill Jokes More Hill Jokes

Why did the ox fall down the hill?

A: It was an oxident.

How do you make a Swiss Roll?

Push him down a hill. BONUS: How do you make French Wine? Invade.