Rug Jokes

How does Spongebob cut a rug?

With a square Dance!

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What do you call it when a dog craps on your rug?

Carpet bombing.

Why are there rugs in front of the stove and the sink?

So women know where to stand in the kitchen.

How do u kno the deceased?

I was his drug dealer. "Louder for the tape " leans in I was his rug feeler. Tested his rugs.

What does a carpet salesman give his wife for Valentine's Day?

Rugs and kisses!

What's up, girl?

Do you like bad boys kicks rug or good guys fixes rug

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What happens when u ask a fake logic fan... What is your favorite logic album?

Their response Flexicution

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What Is A Kiss?

Answer: Its An Inquiry At The Top Floor Regarding The Vacancy In The Ground Floor.

How do thieves kiss?

They make out like bandits.

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Why did the car judder to a stop when it saw a ghost?

It had a nervous breakdown.

What's the definition of a nervous breakdown ?

A chameleon on a tartan rug !

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What do you call a hairpiece on an Asian guy?

an Oriental Rug.

What happens to an Asian guy when they run into a wall with a full erection?

They break their nose!

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Why women fail at saving money?

Have you ever seen a money-box (piggy bank) with a hole at the bottom...

What do women and Google have in common?

They never let you finish first. (#s)

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Why do Asian people never seem to age?

I met a chinese girl today & I estimate her age to be somewhere between 4 & 197.

What do you call an asian walking a dog?

A vegetarian.

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What did the 9 year old girl say to her swimming instructor?

Will I really sink if you take your fingers out

What do you call a sinking ship full of condiments?

Sinko de Mayo

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What do you call a chameleon that doesn't change color?

A reptile dysfunction.

Why are Chameleons surprisingly good at flying?

Because they are always in duh skies