What do an Iraqi baby, an American president, and a homesick Brit visiting Jerusalem all want?

They all want either pees, peace or peas in the middle east.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why did the actor fire his Gorilla agent?

The big Ape kept wanting to take more than a 10% bite!

What word starts with "n" and you never want to call a black person?

Neighbor

American Jokes More American Jokes

How can you tell if an American has a conceal carry permit?

They'll tell you.

How do you tell if someone online is American?

They keep their caps locked and guns loaded. (Not the best and not original)

Pea Jokes More Pea Jokes

What's an idealist vegetarian's favorite meal?

Peas and hominy

What's the most polite meal?

Peas and franks.

Visit Jokes More Visit Jokes

What did the surfer say when he visited Syria?

This place is totally radical!

What did the gardener yell when his vegetarian friend visited?

Run Berry, run!

Peace Jokes More Peace Jokes

What kinds of vegetables did Ghandi prefer?

Peace and carrots... Thought this up at work today. I'm sure it's been done before but it made me chuckle...

What were the martyr's last words?

I believe in peace in our time

Pee Jokes More Pee Jokes

What did Charlie Bucket say when Willie Wonka peed on him?

I've got a golden tinkle in my eye...

Why is it so hard for an eighty year old woman to pee in the morning?

Have you ever tried pulling apart a grilled cheese?!

Middle East Jokes More Middle East Jokes

Why aren't there any Walmarts in the middle east?

Because there's Targets around every corner.

What's the most dangerous bar to go to in the middle east?

The allahu ak-bar

Iraqi Jokes More Iraqi Jokes

What do you call an Iraqi bodybuilder?

A Mosul man

How do you play Iraqi bingo?

F18...B52...F18

Jerusalem Jokes More Jerusalem Jokes

What do an Iraqi baby, an American president, and a homesick Brit visiting Jerusalem all want?

They all want either pees, peace or peas in the middle east.

How did Jesus get across Jerusalem on a busy Friday afternoon?

Cross traffic doesn't stop.

American President Jokes More American President Jokes

What do an Iraqi baby, an American president, and a homesick Brit visiting Jerusalem all want?

They all want either pees, peace or peas in the middle east.

Which American President was least guilty?

Abraham Lincoln. He was in a cent.