What do you call an English teacher five feet tall covered from head to toe in boils and totally bald?

Sir!

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Foot Jokes More Foot Jokes

Why did cavemen pull their women around by their hair?

Because if they had pulled them by their feet they would have filled up with mud

Why is my hand 11 inches long?

Because if it were any longer it would be a foot!

Cover Jokes More Cover Jokes

What was the most reliable and helpful vehicle in the 1800s?

The "I've got this Covered" Waggon

What is hot and makes me hard?

Being covered in lava.

Head Jokes More Head Jokes

What does 007 wear on his head?

A Bondana.

How do you castrate a priest?

Kick the altar boy in the back off the head

Boil Jokes More Boil Jokes

What's an Irish Seven Course Dinner?

A boiled potato and a six-pack of Guinness Stout.

What on Earth happened?

The doctor said, surprised. "I don't know, it started with a boil on my arse." the frog said.

Toe Jokes More Toe Jokes

What did the college junior say just before her toe was cut off?

NO PLEASE DON'T CUT OFF MY TOE!

What did the little cell say to his sister when she stepped on his toe?

My toe sis!

English Jokes More English Jokes

What do English pirates call each other?

M80

What's the most 'Spoken' language on Earth?

Hint: It's not English Spanish.

English Teacher Jokes More English Teacher Jokes

Why did the English teacher hire a midget geography nut as his lawyer?

He wanted someone who understood and case.

How is a judge like an English teacher?

They both hand out long sentences.