English Teacher Jokes

What did the English teacher write when she needed to borrow money?

An AE I.O.U. P.S. Im proud of this one :3

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Coffee Mug

What do you call an English teacher who used to have anxiety?

Past tense.

Why did the English teacher hire a midget geography nut as his lawyer?

He wanted someone who understood and case.

Where did the English teacher and the student fight?

in the MLA boxing ring

Who, what, when, where and why?

English teachers and Alzheimer's patients

What do you call an English teacher five feet tall covered from head to toe in boils and totally bald?

Sir!

How is a judge like an English teacher?

They both hand out long sentences.

When is an English teacher like a judge?

When she hands out long sentences.

Why don't English teachers like parole?

They prefer complete sentences.

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Toe Jokes More Toe Jokes

Why do blondes have TGIF on their shoes?

Toes go in first!

What did the person say when someone tried to cut off their toes?

I'm lactose intolerant.

Cover Jokes More Cover Jokes

How do you offend a vegan?

Cover your ears with your hands

Why are manhole covers round?

Because manholes are round

Parole Jokes More Parole Jokes

Why don't English teachers like parole?

They prefer complete sentences.

What has 6 letters, starts with 'P', and ends a sentence?

Parole.

Boil Jokes More Boil Jokes

Why was Easter the aardvark's favorite holiday?

Because he liked aard-boiled eggs!

What do you call a cat that has boils on its skin and can't feel it's toes?

A leperd

M Jokes More M Jokes

What's the difference between an M&amp?

M and a tiny mute in your tuna sandwich screaming for help? One melts in your mouth, one mouths in your melt.

What starts with an 'M', ends with 'arriage', and recently made me the happiest man alive?

Miscarriage

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What did the bee use to dry off after swimming?

A *bee*ch towel. What did the bee use to get out the tangles A honeycomb.

What performance enhancing drugs do penguins use?

Polaroids

Long Sentence Jokes More Long Sentence Jokes

When is an English teacher like a judge?

When she hands out long sentences.

What is the longest sentence in the English language?

I do."

Anxiety Jokes More Anxiety Jokes

What do you call an English teacher who used to have anxiety?

Past tense.

What's it's for anyway?

Anxiety.