Flap Jokes

Why is there a flap on the back of the Navy uniform?

So the Marine have something to hold on to.

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How does a woman know she's sleeping with a forklift driver?

He beeps twice before coming through the flaps.

What did the midget get when he ran under the strippers legs?

A flap in the face.

What do you call a fanny on a fanny on a fanny?

A block of flaps

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Marine Jokes More Marine Jokes

Why are marines who can't swim better?

They defend the ship with way more enthusiasm.

What's the fastest branch of the military?

The Marines. When they retire, they're corvettes.

Beep Jokes More Beep Jokes

How does a woman know she's sleeping with a forklift driver?

He beeps twice before coming through the flaps.

What song did Scar sing when he fixed his car horn?

Beep repaired...

Hold Jokes More Hold Jokes

Why is the founder of Comcast going to purgatory?

He met St. Peter at the pearly gates and St. Peter said was, "Please hold. Your soul is very important to us."

What is the most offensive joke you know?

I'm bored tonight and I have a no holds barred sense of humour. What are some of your worst

Vampire Jokes More Vampire Jokes

What do you call a vampire after it is one-year-old?

A two-year-old vampire.

What do vampires put on their turkey at Christmas ?

Grave-y !

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

How many walruses does it take to make a sandwich?

Don't be silly, walruses don't make sandwiches; women make sandwiches. Made this up to bug my sister. It worked. Her husband laughed.

What's love?

Me: Well, all the women text you except the one you like. And it hurts, so we drink. Sister: Get away from him!

Enter Jokes More Enter Jokes

How does Bran Stark enter a brothel?

With a Hodor

How does Bill Gates enter his house?

A. He uses "windows".

Face Jokes More Face Jokes

What is the worst thing about getting hit in the face with PI?

It never ends.

What's the difference between a chickpea and a lentil?

I wouldn't pay 50 to have a lentil on my face...

Midget Jokes More Midget Jokes

What did the police officer say to the midget complaining that someone picked his pocket?

I can't believe someone would stoop so low.

Why was the midget fired from his job?

He came up short on his register.