Journalist Jokes

What do you call a journalist in Russia?

An ambulance.

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How often to wizard journalists get paid?

They make a Daily Prophet.

What do you call a Hillary supporter?

A journalist.

How do you make a journalist laugh?

By giving them ar-ticles!

How many journalists does it take to change a light bulb?

We just report the facts we don't change them."

What keyboard shortcut is extensively used by journalists who work for Breitbart News?

alt right

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O Jokes More O Jokes

What's that over there, is it a gho-o-o-ost?

Ooooooooo S: OK! OK!

What does a guy who can predict the lottery numbers 99% of the time have in common with the letters C, D, G, H, J, K, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, and Z?

They're not infallible

Bullet Jokes More Bullet Jokes

Why do police in the US carry a tazer and pepper spray?

In case they run out of bullets.

Why did Maria Shriver marry Arnold Schwarzenegger?

To breed a Kennedy that could take a bullet.

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What do you call people who use the "pull out" method for contraception?

Parents.

How do you speak to a deaf Ted Cruz?

Use zodiac signs

Ambulance Jokes More Ambulance Jokes

What do you call a woman that won't make a sandwich?

An ambulance.

What was the ambulance saying when they were carrying Satoru Iwata?

Wii U Wii U Wii U Wii U

Light Bulb Jokes More Light Bulb Jokes

How many RothChilds does it take to change a light bulb?

There still working on it...

How many Germans does it take to screw in a light bulb?

NINE!

Reward Jokes More Reward Jokes

Why wouldn't the worker accept 10 fresh chickens as a reward for saving a farm on fire?

It was a poultry amount

How do you reward a chicken journalist?

With a poulette surprise!

Change Jokes More Change Jokes

How many designers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Does it really have to be a lightbulb

How many Biebers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. There are no light bulbs in the closet. Another one: Why is Justin Bieber so pale Because there's no light inside the closet

Wizard Jokes More Wizard Jokes

What is yellow and goes click-click?

A ball-point banana. Witch: Will I lose my looks as I get older Wizard: With luck yes. Witch:

What do you call a wizard holding a teacup?

A saucer-er!