Lisp Jokes

What do you call the man with a lisp who drowned?

A philosopher. Cuz he's a deep thinker.

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What do you call a kid with an eye patch, braces and a lisp?

Names

What do you call a traitor with a lisp?

Judith

What do you call a dirty drug addict with a lisp?

Methy

What did a lemon with a lisp say to the juicer?

Thtop taking the pith out of me!

What does a white girl with a lisp say?

Yaaathh

What's long green and goes hith ?

A snake with a lisp !

What did the clam with a lisp say to his greedy friend?

You're so shelfish!

What do you call salesman with a lisp?

Rodger. He's the one with the lisp, not you, so why would you call him anything different

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Lemon Jokes More Lemon Jokes

How did Sherlock reply to Watson's inquiry, "Sherlock, where did you get all of these lemons?

A lemon tree, my dear Watson."

Why did the lemon go sour?

Because it had Lemon-Aids

Snake Jokes More Snake Jokes

What did the snake say when offered a piece of cheese ?

Thanks I'll just have a sliver !

What's a good movie?

Me: "Snakes on a plane" Friend: "Whats it about " Me: "Horses... horses on a boat"

Brace Jokes More Brace Jokes

Who's there ! Bolton ! Bolton who ?

Bolton braces !

What does a redneck say for foreplay?

Brace yourself, Linda-Lou"

Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

What's the appropriate age to take the electric shock collar off your kid?

My son's 10 years... hold on... OFF THE COUCH! brb... convulsing.

What do you get a kid without arms for Christmas?

Gloves, but he doesn't know that yet.. since he can't open it.

Pith Jokes More Pith Jokes

What did a lemon with a lisp say to the juicer?

Thtop taking the pith out of me!

Why did the orange fall out with the orange-peeler?

Because he was taking the pith. /gets coat. bai.

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

What do you call the man with a lisp who drowned?

A philosopher. Cuz he's a deep thinker.

What did the man get for winning the muscle relaxing contest?

Atrophy!

Eye Patch Jokes More Eye Patch Jokes

What do you call a kid with an eye patch, braces and a lisp?

Names

Why do all Pirates wear eye patches?

Chuck Norris.

Thimble Jokes More Thimble Jokes

What's the best thing to do with a thimble?

Bang it with a drum-thtick!

What's a thimble?

By definithion, thomething that represenths or thtands for thomething elth. Thymbolithm, y'know.