Lisp Jokes

What do you call the man with a lisp who drowned?

A philosopher. Cuz he's a deep thinker.

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What do you call a kid with an eye patch, braces and a lisp?

Names

What do you call a traitor with a lisp?

Judith

What do you call a dirty drug addict with a lisp?

Methy

What did a lemon with a lisp say to the juicer?

Thtop taking the pith out of me!

What does a white girl with a lisp say?

Yaaathh

What's long green and goes hith ?

A snake with a lisp !

What did the clam with a lisp say to his greedy friend?

You're so shelfish!

What do you call salesman with a lisp?

Rodger. He's the one with the lisp, not you, so why would you call him anything different

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Eye Patch Jokes More Eye Patch Jokes

What do all Japanese Airmen wear eye patches?

Because they're pirots!

Why do all Pirates wear eye patches?

Chuck Norris.

Clam Jokes More Clam Jokes

Why did the clam go to jail?

For setting up illegal shell companies!

What did the clam with a lisp say to his greedy friend?

You're so shelfish!

Thimble Jokes More Thimble Jokes

What's the best thing to do with a thimble?

Bang it with a drum-thtick!

What's a thimble?

By definithion, thomething that represenths or thtands for thomething elth. Thymbolithm, y'know.

Snake Jokes More Snake Jokes

What did one snake say to another ?

Hiss off !

What is an ark?

2) How 2 build ark 3) Can god just build ark 4) Are snakes necessary 5) Is god real or am I high

Pith Jokes More Pith Jokes

What did a lemon with a lisp say to the juicer?

Thtop taking the pith out of me!

Why did the orange fall out with the orange-peeler?

Because he was taking the pith. /gets coat. bai.

Brace Jokes More Brace Jokes

What does a redneck say for foreplay?

Brace yourself, Linda-Lou"

What does a spider want to be when he grows up?

This is really good guys...brace yourselves..........) A web designer.

Philosopher Jokes More Philosopher Jokes

What time do philosophers like to visit the shopping mall?

At the Schopenhauer.

How do philosophers shave off their beards?

Occam's razor

Traitor Jokes More Traitor Jokes

What is a traitor?

A tray shaped dinosaur. Credits go to the wife for that one! She still giggles when she tells it.

What do you call a traitor with a lisp?

Judith