Vegas Jokes

Why have no melons ever gotten married in Vegas?

Because they can't elope!

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Why couldn't the watermelon get married in Vegas?

Because his fiancee is a cantaloupe!

Why didn't the melons get married in Vegas?

Because they cantaloupe. This joke was brought to you by Dads inc.

What does Tupak Shakur have in common with Lethal Weapon 4?

Both were shot in Vegas

What's the hottest hotel in Vegas?

The Cosmopolitan

What does Tupac Shakur and Oceans 13 have in common?

They were both shot in Vegas!

Why was the rooster happy after his trip to Vegas?

He got clucky.

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What do you get when you mix gangsta rap and relational aesthetics?

Albums released through California penal records.

What kind of cigarettes do California kids smoke?

Yours.

Small Fortune Jokes More Small Fortune Jokes

What is the most tried and true method to getting a small fortune?

Start out with a large fortune.

How do you make a small fortune in the movie industry?

You spend a large fortune

Joke Jokes More Joke Jokes

Why did the priest dislike geometry?

It's sin-ful. self made joke

How do you ruin a joke?

By reposting it every week!

Wedding Jokes More Wedding Jokes

What's the difference between a wedding and a funeral?

One less drunk.

Why was the naturists wedding delayed?

The ring bearer had an erection.

Rooster Jokes More Rooster Jokes

What do you get if you cross a phone with a rooster?

A wake-up call!

What's the difference between a rooster and a lawyer?

The rooster's primal urge is to cluck defiance.

Hire Jokes More Hire Jokes

How does the Easter Bunny paint all of those eggs?

He hires Santa's elves during the off-season.

Why did Muhammad hire Moses to help with his start-up?

He wanted to double his prophets.

Marry Jokes More Marry Jokes

What would you do if I died?

Husband: I would go crazy Wife: Would you re-marry Husband: Ah, not that crazy..

What are ants called when they run away very fast to get married?

Ant-elopers.

Shoot Jokes More Shoot Jokes

Why do black people play basketball?

Because it teaches them how to shoot, run and steal.

How many girls a boy need to shoot a school?

None.