Vegas Jokes

Why have no melons ever gotten married in Vegas?

Because they can't elope!

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Why couldn't the watermelon get married in Vegas?

Because his fiancee is a cantaloupe!

Why didn't the melons get married in Vegas?

Because they cantaloupe. This joke was brought to you by Dads inc.

What does Tupak Shakur have in common with Lethal Weapon 4?

Both were shot in Vegas

What's the hottest hotel in Vegas?

The Cosmopolitan

What does Tupac Shakur and Oceans 13 have in common?

They were both shot in Vegas!

Why was the rooster happy after his trip to Vegas?

He got clucky.

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New Jersey had first choice.

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Yours.

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How much for this toaster?

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Why do midgets not wear tampons?

They might trip on the string.

How do you get ready for a trip around the Sun?

Planet

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How many fugitives does it take to fix a light bulb?

1/3

Why was 11 afraid of 12?

Because 12 13 14!

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All their supporters are home with sick kids

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He used the Hookshot!

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How do you know it was not U.S. that did the aerial bombing?

Because the funeral, wedding and hospital were not the targets.

Where do rabbits go after their wedding?

On their bunnymoon.

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What's the worst part about making out with a perfect 10?

The cold feeling on your lips when you realize you're kissing the mirror

What did Ghost A say to Ghost B?

Nothing because ghosts don't exist. Edit:Holy crap I just realized I didn't post this on /r/antijokes.

Cantaloupe Jokes More Cantaloupe Jokes

Why are melons so lonely?

Because they cantaloupe

Why won't the honeydew marry the watermelon?

Because they cantaloupe..