Crimea Jokes

What song did Russia send Ukraine for its birthday?

Crimea a river

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Why are people so sore about Russia taking the Crimea?

I mean cry me a river river right

What's the current number one song in Russia?

Crimea river

How Many Russians Does It Take To Invade Crimea?

None according to the Russians.

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River Jokes More River Jokes

What's grey stands in a river when it rains and doesn't get wet ?

An elephant with an umbrella !

What did the river say when it saw the beavers?

I'll be dammed.

Number Jokes More Number Jokes

Why didn't the number 4 get into the nightclub?

Because he is 2 square.

What did the naturalist say when he saw a number of rocks covered in moss?

I'm lichen what I see"

Swim Jokes More Swim Jokes

Why aren't the Williams sisters competing against Michael Phelps?

Black people can't swim.

Why is it a bad idea to swim in the Mississippi River?

Because it has pp in it.

Mean Jokes More Mean Jokes

When is the one time when no doesn't mean no?

When a woman rejects feminism.

What letter should you avoid?

The letter A because it makes men mean.

Meet Jokes More Meet Jokes

What happens when 2 meets 3 at Times Square?

36

What did Justin Bieber's biggest fan say to him when they met?

nothing, hes a fan.

Birthday Jokes More Birthday Jokes

What do you say to Aziz Ansari when you forget his birthday?

Aziz, I'm sorry.

What did the boy with no hands get for his birthday?

I don't know he hasn't opened it yet.

Putin Jokes More Putin Jokes

Where did Putin tell the protesters where to meet?

Crimea River

What do Americans and Putin have in common?

They'll both be nuking Turkey after Thanksgiving.

Like Jokes More Like Jokes

Why don't paperclips move around a lot?

They like being stationery.

Why does Jared love 6-inch subs?

He doesn't, he likes 14-year old girls