Lap Jokes

How do you exorcise a demon?

Make him run a lap then do 10 push-ups and sit-ups

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug
5.0

Coffee Mug

How many countries' flags make an appearance at every auto race in the world?

Two. Libya's to start the race, and France's to signal there's one lap to go.

What did the sea-world trainer's friend say to him after he spilled water on his friends lap?

You did that on porpoise

What's the difference between the Olympic long distance race and the Paralympic long distance race?

A lap

What is the difference between a creep and a kid?

I wouldn't let a creep sit on my lap.

Why do athletes prefer nuns to time their laps?

Because when a nun times anything it's zero. (0*n=0) :D

What kind of computers do chihuahuas like best?

Lap-top!

You might also enjoy:

Porpoise Jokes More Porpoise Jokes

What did the dolphin say to the other dolphin after he splashed him?

Hey! You did that on porpoise!"

Why was the animal unhappy?

He had a ruff week.. His life wasn't purrfect. His brother was a shellout. His mother's been a real crab lately. His family was really shellfish. He had no porpoise in life.

Spill Jokes More Spill Jokes

What do you call it when you spill your morning drive-through beverage on your virus scan software?

Getting McCafe on McAfee

Why did the ebo(l)la patient yell?

Someone spilled wine (bolla) on his ELECTRONIC. (E)phones.

Girl Jokes More Girl Jokes

What do guys like but are afraid of?

Girls

Why does Sirius Black get all the girls?

Because he's a real dawg.

Paralympic Jokes More Paralympic Jokes

Whats better than winning silver at the paralympics?

Not being a cripple.

What's better than winning a silver in the paralympics?

Being able to walk.

Lance Armstrong Jokes More Lance Armstrong Jokes

What Happened when the girl sat on Lance Armstrong's lap?

She had a ball

What type of pen does Lance Armstrong use?

Uniball.

Race Jokes More Race Jokes

Why did Michael Jackson always lose in a race?

Because he always came in a lil behind.

What did the man in the "Race for a Cure" say to the three people beside him?

we're walking four abreast."

Sit Jokes More Sit Jokes

How many feminists does it take to screw in lightbulb?

It doesn't matter how many you get, because all they'll do is sit around complaining about how misogynistic the use of the word "screw" is.

What's the difference between america and a yoghurt?

A yoghurt develops a culture After sitting there for 100 years.

Exorcise Jokes More Exorcise Jokes

How do Catholic church priests stay healthy?

They exorcise.

What do you call the ghost of a dessert-chef who returns no matter how many times they're exorcised?

A boo-meringue