Mercede Jokes

What's the difference between a Mercedes and Princess Diana?

The Mercedes can easily reach 40.

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Whats the difference between a guy who has a new Mercedes and a guy who has an old Mercedes?

The guy who has a new Mercedes is rich. The guy who has an old Mercedes has been rich for a longer time.

Why did the rich guy crash his car?

He wanted to see how the Mercedes bends

How can you tell a rich Swiss from a poor Swiss?

The poor swiss washes his Mercedes by himself

What's the difference between a bag of dead babies and a mercedes?

I don't have a mercedes in my garage!

What is the difference between a Mercedes and a Lexus?

Princess Diana wouldn't be caught dead in a Lexus...

What's the difference between a Volvo and a Mercedes?

Princess Diana wouldn't be caught dead in a Volvo

What's the difference between a porcupine and a Mercedes?

A porcupine has the pricks on the outside.

What's the common thing between Mercedes and iphone 6?

Mercedes Benz...

What did Mike Meyers say to Eddie Murphy after Eddie bought him a brand new Mercedes?

DANKE!"

What's the difference between a Mercedes and a bunch of dead babies?

I don't have a Mercedes in my garage.

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Dead Baby Jokes More Dead Baby Jokes

What do Beethoven's 9th and a dead baby have in common?

They're both D-composed.

Whats worse than five dead babies in a trash can?

One dead baby in five trash cans

Mercedes Benz Jokes More Mercedes Benz Jokes

What's the common thing between Mercedes and iphone 6?

Mercedes Benz...

What's the difference between a porcupine and a Mercedes Benz?

The porcupine's pricks are on the outside.

Remove Jokes More Remove Jokes

How many mods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

removed

What's the deal with /r/worldnews?

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Catch Jokes More Catch Jokes

Why did the man run around his bed?

Because he was trying to catch up on his sleep!

What is the difference between a Mercedes and a Lexus?

Princess Diana wouldn't be caught dead in a Lexus...

Porcupine Jokes More Porcupine Jokes

What the difference between a police car and a porcupine?

With a police car, the pricks are on the inside

How do porcupines hug?

Carefully!

Swiss Jokes More Swiss Jokes

What's in Heaven and Hell?

In Heaven, the cops are British, the engineers are German, the lovers are French, the cooks are Italian and the whole thing is managed by the Swiss In Hell, the cops are German, the engineers are French, the lovers are Swiss, the cooks are British and the whole thing is managed by the Italians

What Nationality was Otzi the Caveman?

He wasn't Italian, because he carried work tools, he wasn't Austrian, since he had some brains, he might have been Swiss, since he was outrun by a glacier, but most probably he was a German, because nobody else ever walks in sandals in the mountains.

6 Jokes More 6 Jokes

Why did 6 break up with 7?

Because 7 ate 9 out

Why was 6 afraid of 7.938?

It was being irrational.

Elephant Jokes More Elephant Jokes

Why did the elephant paints it's toes red?

So he could hide in the cherry tree.

What do you get when you cross a hippo, an elephant, and a rhino?

Helefino.