Mercede Jokes

What's the difference between a Mercedes and Princess Diana?

The Mercedes can easily reach 40.

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Whats the difference between a guy who has a new Mercedes and a guy who has an old Mercedes?

The guy who has a new Mercedes is rich. The guy who has an old Mercedes has been rich for a longer time.

Why did the rich guy crash his car?

He wanted to see how the Mercedes bends

How can you tell a rich Swiss from a poor Swiss?

The poor swiss washes his Mercedes by himself

What's the difference between a bag of dead babies and a mercedes?

I don't have a mercedes in my garage!

What is the difference between a Mercedes and a Lexus?

Princess Diana wouldn't be caught dead in a Lexus...

What's the difference between a Volvo and a Mercedes?

Princess Diana wouldn't be caught dead in a Volvo

What's the difference between a porcupine and a Mercedes?

A porcupine has the pricks on the outside.

What's the common thing between Mercedes and iphone 6?

Mercedes Benz...

What did Mike Meyers say to Eddie Murphy after Eddie bought him a brand new Mercedes?

DANKE!"

What's the difference between a Mercedes and a bunch of dead babies?

I don't have a Mercedes in my garage.

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Reach Jokes More Reach Jokes

How many dead whores does it take to change a light bulb?

More than three, I still can't reach it.

How did spider-man reach the inner city kids?

He web-slang

Swiss Jokes More Swiss Jokes

Why does no one like the swiss army?

Because they are all a bunch of tools.

Why does God like Swiss cheese?

It's holey! get it

Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What happens when you throw a green stone into the Red Sea?

It gets wet.

What happens when you wear radioactive Russian underpants?

Cher nob'll fall out.

Outside Jokes More Outside Jokes

Which side of the chicken has more feathers?

The outside.

What's the difference between a porcupine and a ferrari?

The porcupine has pricks on the outside.

Dead Baby Jokes More Dead Baby Jokes

What do you get when you throw a dead baby off a cliff?

A pleasant erection

What's the difference between a million dollar car and a pile of dead babies?

There's no million dollar car in my garage.

Catch Jokes More Catch Jokes

When did Pinocchio learn he was made of wood?

when his hand caught fire!!

How do you catch a WiFi?

With an ethernet!

Garage Jokes More Garage Jokes

Why should you hire a drag queen to help clean your garage?

They know how to tuck away junk.

What is the difference between 1000 dead babies and a ferrari?

I dont have a ferrari in my garage.

Car Jokes More Car Jokes

What do you call a white guy with 2 black guys in the back of the car?

The police. What do you call a black guy with 2 white guys in the back of the car Uber!

What's the difference between a sigh a car and a monkey?

A sigh is oh dear. A car is too dear. A monkey is you dear.