What's your opener?

JESUS: "God loves you." You BUDDHA (crumpling paper that says Life Is Suffering): Me too

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Life Jokes More Life Jokes

Why is there no life on Mars?

No WiFi...

What do you have when life gives you melons?

Dyslexia.

Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

What did Jesus do to lose weight?

Crossfit

Why did Jesus leave the dance floor?

Because it was Hammertime'

Love Jokes More Love Jokes

What's the difference between an 18yo and a washing machine?

You can dump your load in a washing machine and it won't follow you round for two weeks telling you it loves you

What is the official bird of love?

The Swallow.

Paper Jokes More Paper Jokes

What do books have that Mexicans don't?

Papers.

Why don't you put an advert in the paper?

Zoo Keeper:"Don't be silly he can't read!"

Suffer Jokes More Suffer Jokes

What do you call El Chapo suffering from seizures?

Narcolepsy

What illness are you suffering from if you keep seeing cartoon animals who talk?

Disney spells.

God Jokes More God Jokes

How do you make God laugh?

Tell him your plans.

What is the difference between Kanye West and God?

God doesn't think that He's Kanye.

Buddha Jokes More Buddha Jokes

What did Buddha say to the Pizza guy?

Make me one with everything."

What kind of pizza does Buddha like?

One with everything.

Opener Jokes More Opener Jokes

What do you call a broken can opener?

A can't opener

What's your opener?

JESUS: "God loves you." You BUDDHA (crumpling paper that says Life Is Suffering): Me too

Crumple Jokes More Crumple Jokes

What's your opener?

JESUS: "God loves you." You BUDDHA (crumpling paper that says Life Is Suffering): Me too

What u doing?

Math, it's due Friday" *I slowly crumple the paper and put it in my mouth* They'll never believe u