What's your opener?

JESUS: "God loves you." You BUDDHA (crumpling paper that says Life Is Suffering): Me too

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Life Jokes More Life Jokes

Why did the black man walk backwards?

I have no idea, Your Honor, but he was coming right at me and I felt my life was at risk.

What's life like in North Korea?

Oh, I can't complain."

Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

Why dosn't Jesus christ play hockey?

Because he'd always get nailed into the boards

Why do mathematicians love talking about Jesus?

Because he's a cross product.

Love Jokes More Love Jokes

Why does Peter Pan always fly?

He Neverlands. I really love this joke because it never grows old!

What do you love most my natural beauty or my body?

Wife: Your sense of humor.

Paper Jokes More Paper Jokes

Why is your paper blank?

Teacher: Why is your paper blank? Student: Sometimes silence is the best answer ! :D :D

Why do they ask you if you want paper or plastic at the supermarket?

Because baggers can't be choosers.

Suffer Jokes More Suffer Jokes

Why are people who suffers from insomnia so excited at the moment?

They only have to sleep 3 more times until Christmas

What type of dog suffers from being inbred?

A hotdog

God Jokes More God Jokes

Why do neurologists think they're God?

Because they can turn any animal into a vegetable!

What did God say to the cheese that sinned?

Gouda Hell.

Buddha Jokes More Buddha Jokes

What kind of hotdog did the Buddha order from the street vendor?

One with everything

What happened to the religious idol when it was put up at auction?

It was sold to the highest Buddha.

Opener Jokes More Opener Jokes

How does a virgin pop her cherry?

by using a bottle opener

What weapon is most feared by knights?

A can opener.

Crumple Jokes More Crumple Jokes

What should we call this portable computer?

SOME GUY: Laptop everyone applauds...w/ tears in my eyes i crumple a paper that says Kneeputer

What u doing?

Math, it's due Friday" *I slowly crumple the paper and put it in my mouth* They'll never believe u