Buddha Jokes

What did the cremated Buddha who was placed in a cardboard box say?

I'm in light urn.'

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Why couldn't the Buddha hoover under the sofa?

Because he had no attachments

What did Buddha say to the Pizza guy?

Make me one with everything."

What kind of hotdog did the Buddha order from the street vendor?

One with everything

Who do you think was smarter, Jesus or Buddha?

I mean, just in terms of not letting themselves get crucified.

What happened to the religious idol when it was put up at auction?

It was sold to the highest Buddha.

Who's there ! Buddha ! Buddha who ?

Buddha this slice of bread for me !

What kind of pizza does Buddha like?

One with everything.

What's your opener?

JESUS: "God loves you." You BUDDHA (crumpling paper that says Life Is Suffering): Me too

Who has the most karma on Reddit?

Buddha.

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Cremate Jokes More Cremate Jokes

What do you call it when a cremated person spins in their grave?

An Urn-ado.

What did the masterbating Australian mortician do?

Cremate

Think Jokes More Think Jokes

What do you call someone who can't think on their feet?

A paraplegic

How do lesbians keep things interesting in the bedroom?

They think outside the box.

God Jokes More God Jokes

How did God make Himself?

I have to remember to start getting high before bedtime.

Why nuns don't wear bras?

God supports everything.

Bread Jokes More Bread Jokes

Why is the Flying Spaghetti Monster made of Pasta?

Because "made of bread" was already taken by Jesus.

What do you call a slice of bread from another country?

An immigraint.

Kind Jokes More Kind Jokes

What kind of dance do buns do?

Abundance.

What kind of bird does not make babies?

A swallow

Cheese Jokes More Cheese Jokes

What cheese is the most religious?

Swiss cheese! (it's the most hole-y)

What do you call a cheese that's not yours?

My cheese!

Place Jokes More Place Jokes

What's the safest place in Dallas during a tornado?

The Cowboys stadium, the only place there'll never be a touchdown

Why is it good that the Vietnamese man won first place?

It's a Nguyen-win situation.

Love Jokes More Love Jokes

Why did everyone love the mushroom at the party?

He was a fungi.

Why do Japanese people love mechs so much?

Because of all the metal in their brains.