Paper Jokes

Three, one suggests to check if it is plug in, another recommends to reboot the printer, and finally one to check to see if the printer had paper and laugh about how easy the solution was.

How ugly was she?

Paper or plasic?

What do you call a belt made of paper?

A waist of paper.

Why did the researcher take his paper to the harbour?

To get it pier reviewed.

Why do they ask you if you would like paper or plastic at the grocery store?

Because baggers can't be choosers,

What's the difference between an immigrant &amp a book?

One of them has papers.

Why don't you put an advert in the paper?

Zoo Keeper:"Don't be silly he can't read!"

Why did the paper follow the pencil?

Because it LED THE WAY! I'm on a roll here! this is fun! Skip

Why did the boy take a pencil and paper to bed?

He was told to draw the curtains before going to sleep.

Why Did The Blind Student Get an F On His Paper?

He didn't sight sources.

What paper product speaks really quickly?

Wrapping paper.

Why are envelopes and papers white?

Because blackmail is illegal.

When a cop pulls you over and asks, "Papers?

answer "Scissors." then drive away..

What's the difference between an elephant and a piece of paper ?

You can't make a paper aeroplane out of an elephant !

How did the mathematician solve his constipation problems?

The same way he solved all other problems: He worked it out with a pencil and paper.

What do books have that Mexicans don't?

Papers.

How was your paper?

Me: I wrote what I knew, I copied what I didn't knew.

What u doing?

Math, it's due Friday" *I slowly crumple the paper and put it in my mouth* They'll never believe u

What's your opener?

JESUS: "God loves you." You BUDDHA (crumpling paper that says Life Is Suffering): Me too

What kind of root is only easy to find on paper?

A square one.*

What kind of papers do dogs write?

A ruff draft.

Why do they ask you if you want paper or plastic at the supermarket?

Because baggers can't be choosers.

What do you get if you cross a labrador and a tortoise ?

A dog that will run to the shop to get your paper and bring back last weeks paper !

What should we call this portable computer?

SOME GUY: Laptop everyone applauds...w/ tears in my eyes i crumple a paper that says Kneeputer

Why were all the girls looking at the piece of paper?

Because it was ripped.

How did the terrorist get into Czechoslovakia?

They didn't czech his papers.

What do you call a truthful piece of paper?

Fax.

How did I clear papers of Islamic Studies?

Have faith, don't question.

What's the similarity between communism and a pencil?

They both only really work on paper

What do you say to someone who is making a cardboard belt?

That's a waist of paper!"

Want to hear a joke about a piece of paper?

Never mind...it's tearable

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What do you get when you cross a philosopher, an insomniac and a dyslexic?

A guy who stays up all night wondering if there's a dog. Infinite Jest, by DFW

What kind of dog lives in a particle accelerator?

A Fermilabrador Retriever.

Speed Jokes More Speed Jokes

What do you call a speeding vegetable?

Michael Schumacher.

What brings you to speed dating?

Me: I just ran out of the fancy shampoo my previous GF bought for me.

Come Jokes More Come Jokes

What happened to you ?

PATIENT:I am going to die in a minute. DOCTOR:wait I am coming with in five minutes.

Why doesn't Coffee get along with milk in Germany?

Cause it doesn't want to be latte. Sorry. I just came up with this lame joke. Downvotes ahoy!

Piece Jokes More Piece Jokes

What did the snake say when offered a piece of cheese ?

Thanks I'll just have a sliver !

How do you make a rave party in Africa?

You stick a piece of bread on the ceiling.

Humor Jokes More Humor Jokes

How can you tell if you have a mature or an immature sense of humor?

poop.

What type of sense of humor does a dust storm have?

A very dry sense of humor

Car Jokes More Car Jokes

What does a Jamaican do when he sees a spaceman?

He parks his car, man.

What happens when Mario parks his car outside the wrong castle?

He gets Toad

Michael Jackson Jokes More Michael Jackson Jokes

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Disney Movies ?

Disney Movies still touch kids

Who was Michael Jackson?

Son: Dad, is God man or a woman? Dad: His both, son. Son: Dad, is God black or white? Dad: His both, son. Son: Dad, is God good or bad? Dad: His both, son. Son: Dad, is God - Michael Jackson?

Absolutely Sense Jokes More Absolutely Sense Jokes

What bleeds once a month and has absolutely no sense of humor?

Me. I'm pretty clumsy so I get paper cuts pretty regularly.

How many of my fellow Germans does it take to change a lightbulb?

Only one of course, as we are highly efficient and have absolutely no sense of humour.