Bacteria Jokes

What do you call bacteria that can swim fast?

Micro Phelps.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

What's the difference between bacteria and rednecks?

When looking at bacteria you can actually find some culture.

Which country has the most number of bacteria, viruses, fungus and other micro-organisms?

GerMany

What happens to a bacteria when he travels from his home colony to another?

He experiences culture shock.

How bacteria stay in contact while they're in jail?

They exchange cell numbers.

Why Can't you see the bacteria in milk?

Because it gets past-your-eyes (pasteurized)

Where do bacteria go when they die?

St. Petri Dish.

Where do bacteria like to vacation?

Germany

What do you call an egocentric strain of bacteria found in a Chipotle burrito?

ME-coli

Why do bacteria congregate in public places?

It's a part of their culture.

Why did the bacteria cross the microscope?

To get to the other slide

Couple's Daily Question Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

Where do the bacteria gangsters hang out?

On the Yeast Side.

You might also enjoy:

Eye Jokes More Eye Jokes

What does a 1 eyed, 1 legged, and deaf kid get for Christmas?

Cancer

What do you call a chicken with lettuce in its eye?

Chicken Caesar salad.

Cross Jokes More Cross Jokes

What do you get when you cross a Sith Lord, and a Donkey?

Darth Mule! A joke, from third grade me... Happy Star Wars day!

Why did the chicken double-cross the road?

To change sides.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a Bald Eagle and an American?

The Bald Eagle is free c:

What's the difference between the Red Hot Chili Peppers and Harriet Tubman?

Harriet Tubman was a heroine to the slaves, but the Red Hot Chili Peppers were slaves to heroin.

Swim Jokes More Swim Jokes

What fish only swims at night ?

A starfish !

How do you know when it's okay to swim in a pool of milk?

When it's past your eyes.

Contact Jokes More Contact Jokes

How do you contact a cross dresser?

Shemail

How does Super Mario contact his dead brother?

Using a Luigi board!

Pasteurize Jokes More Pasteurize Jokes

Why Can't you see the bacteria in milk?

Because it gets past-your-eyes (pasteurized)

What's the fastest liquid on earth?

Milk. It's pasteurized before you see it.

Vacation Jokes More Vacation Jokes

What did the fog say to the light rain after her vacation?

A. I mist you.

Where do pencils go for vacation?

Pencil-vania.

Petri Dish Jokes More Petri Dish Jokes

What's the difference between a petri dish and white people?

A petri dish develops a culture.

What is a bacteria's OTHER favorite dish?

The PETRI dish!